June 2, 2007

I’m sleeping with a married man….

Im sorry that I am so foolish!! I know what I am doing is stupid, but its so fun and exciting I just cant help it. Im sleeping with a married man of thirty years old. WOW that sounds trashy! I was once such a classy girl, now I am no longer true to myself. I know this relationship will go NOWHERE! But I blindly hold on to some kind of hope… I will be so sorry in the future, I know this.Submitted by: Gabby

posted to Lovers, Sex, Yourself

296 comments

  • At 3:30 am on July 16, 2007, Richelle commented:

    Im sleeping with a married man who is also my manager at work. People are starting to assume shit. I know its not going anywhere and it sickens me that I would do this to a innocent woman and family. Rebound relationship for me but still so wrong, cause when you sleep with a married man you are more than likely looking to get heartbroken. Im in for hell because I couldnt control the urge to hook up with my “hot boss.”

  • At 6:15 am on July 16, 2007, JP commented:

    After my divorce with my ex, I met a guy, who ended up being married. At first I was hesitant, because my husband cheated on me with his current girlfriend when we were still married, and I know how much it truly hurt me. But I gave into to my sexual needs and slept with him, over and over again for a about a month and a half. Then, he told me one day he couldn’t continue to do it, that he needed to step up to the plate and be a better father to his daughter, and try to work things out with his wife. I had mixed emotions about that, because I wish my husband would have made that desicion for me and our two sons, but he chose his girlfriend instead, but on the other hand i was a little upset, only because he led me on telling me what we had was cool. We stopped talking for about 5 months, but just today he texted me with he wanted to see me again soon. I want to see him, because he has been on my mind the whole time, but then I am worried I will go through the same shit all over again…It is a bad idea to get involved with a married man, because one way or the other someone is bound to get hurt…

  • At 10:56 pm on October 5, 2007, G double o D good commented:

    Do it. Be with the Married Man. No one is grading you on this, but yourself. Eventually we are all going to get hurt one way or another. What IF he really is the one for you? How would you know? Or did you already set yourself up for failure? What, just because it’s not socially or morally accepted in our society? There are thousands of things that are still not accepted in our society… who made these rules to complicate our lives anyway? Do what you want to do. You are a grown and mature adult. You are aware of the consequences and the disadvantages. What else is new? Live it up and stop asking for advice.

  • At 6:40 pm on October 7, 2007, bad girl gone worse commented:

    g double o g
    that was the realist comment i have ever read
    life is all about living

  • At 6:52 am on November 18, 2007, a commented:

    I totally disagree. What seeds you sow you will reap - plant carefully. And, what he/she does to someone else they will certainly do to you too. Man for you?#@$! Come on.

  • At 3:38 pm on January 30, 2008, Steph Moore commented:

    Have a little dignity, sweetie! You deserve better than someone else’s seconds and honey, you will always be second to his wife! Where is your integrity - if you don’t know what it means - look it up! Married men are not for you to screw around with - what if you were the wife - would you want someone doing that to you? Get a brain!

  • At 2:26 am on February 20, 2008, stuck in a bad situation commented:

    i am 30 years old and have been sleeping with a married man for 2yrs i never thought this would be me but when i met him i couldnt help myself he is everything i ever wanted in a man but hes not mine and will never be we have a good relationship and we enjoy each other he has never said anything about leaving his wife i dont think he ever will i just cant figure out why i am so in love with him i would never say a word to his wife or jepordize his marriage because it is not her fault that he is what he is but at the same time i wonder if you come to me for what she isnt doing what is the reason he is still there

  • At 4:36 pm on March 20, 2008, concerned commented:

    My friend just told me that she is sleeping with a married salesman that asked for her number one day. At first, innocent dates, supper etc. Now when he calls and tells her he is in the area she gets in the car with her overnight bag ready for the hotel he’s staying at. How disgraceful. Until she met him, she was a virgin. I had also asked her to be my maid of honor this summer, someone to stand up in believing that two people are meant for each other and publicly saying vows. And she’s out &*E@ing a married man herself! It’s embarassing. But of course no one knows about it so it’s all ok… wake up and smell the dam coffee!

  • At 6:33 pm on March 30, 2008, Confused Girl commented:

    Im sleeping with a married man - When we first met he tld me he was single, we had a few dates and then eventually he told me the truth! But by then I really liked him and so I can understasnd how you feel! But Im not stupid, he is 18 yrs older than me and so is his wife - I feel bad for her but at the same time I just cant help myself. HE IS A BASTARD I WISH HE WOULD JUST LEAVE EITHER ME OR HER!!

  • At 1:46 am on April 16, 2008, Attracted2theTaken commented:

    Wow. Up until I read these posts, I thouhgt I was the only woman sleeping with a married man…and enjoying every minute of it. This guy I met a little over a month ago. He’s so sexy and everything I want in a man. I know that he will never be mine and I am ok with the fact that he may never leave his wife. I don’t want to marry him, I just want to f*&^ him! That sounds harsh but it’s true.

    Now, for the longest time I lived by the whole “You reap what you sow” motto but I realized that I am meant to be by myself. I just don’t believe there is anyone out there for me. So am I supposed to be lonely and watch everyone live it up? Hell no! I’m going for mine! That sounds horrible but I’m tired of “saving myself” for that special someone when the truth is HE IS NOT OUT THERE! So….I’m enjoying myself right now.

    Yahoooo!!!!!

  • At 6:55 pm on May 21, 2008, infatuatedgirl commented:

    I, too, am sleeping with a married man. I never, in a million years, thought that I would be someone to do such a thing. But, at the same time, I can honestly say he is everything I need right now. I dont want a relationship, not like the ones all my girlfriends have. Not now. So, for the time being, I will enjoy him.

  • At 1:48 pm on May 23, 2008, Emilia commented:

    Hi all, well I’ve been sleeping with a married guy since last fall. What can I say he is 32 years older than me, I’m in my early thirties, and so I got lazy, I got tired of waiting for Mr. Right, most of the young guys I’ve met are stupid, and immature. This guy works in the same company I work, is 6′3, athletic, caring, super smart (a phd from harvard) elegant, very masculine with a deep sexy voice. I never thought in my life would have ever imagined myself in this situation, but the chemistry was so strong, that I fell for him very quickly. He seemed to be very needed of affection and attention, and he’s pretty bored of her high class lifestyle, with all its manners and always keeping up appearances, and there I was, a bad ass girl with hot bods and brain, he couldn’t even resist and both of we gave in to our fleshy desires… We fell in love, but he as a man is more mental than emotional, so he is having a bash living a life with her wife in a nother country, and here with me seeing me not so often now. Well it was easy to enter but I don’t find the way out, help, I want to open my eyes, and use my brain, because I know this is a no win situation, that he’s using me for sex, company or whatever but he will never commit himself to me, he is already comitted. We meet almost every week, and I glow when I’m with him, but when he’s away I don’t know what to do, I feel so miserable when I don’t see his car in the parking lot cause I know he has left the town and headed to his home. And I’m alone, again, I’m alone when I’m with him, anyways, because he’s not there for me when I need him… This ain’t no worth my time, my emotional and physical health. I decided to leave him, we’ll see if this time I can, wish me luck, I want to break free LOL.

  • At 8:54 pm on May 23, 2008, Falling for him... commented:

    I have been sleeping with a married man for almost a year now, at first it was just exciting and fun, now I am getting attached to him. We have a lot in common and I enjoy our conversations, the sex is amazing… we both agree that if things were different we would definitely see what could happen. I am not stupid, I know he will never leave her, but I am addicted to him, I can’t stop seeing him. The fact that he is my boss and have to see each other almost everyday doesn’t help. I feel bad at times, but would he really be involved with me if he was completely happy at home??

  • At 5:32 pm on July 16, 2008, CialisKa commented:

    Usefool post, thx

  • At 7:33 pm on August 6, 2008, Anonymous commented:

    I dated a married man for 6 months and it was great at the beginning of the relationship. He treated me like his gf and spent a lot of quality time with me. We didn’t even have sex for the first month or so and it showed that he really wanted to get to know me as a person. He never mentioned his other life much and kept it to himself which was fine by me. I’m sure he loved his wife and I don’t think he had any intention of leaving her and I was fine with that.I respected the limits of our relationship due to his marriage. I just got relegated to a booty call in the end and that was the main problem. He only called me when he was bored or wanted to get laid. There was no way I would ever be the equal to his wife but I at least wanted to be respected.

  • At 12:24 pm on August 9, 2008, Shelly commented:

    Okay… Like many of you, I am in the same situation.. For the past year, I have built a relationship with a married man. He is everything that I have ever wanted in a man, and I still love him with all my heart.. I would have never thought that I could get myself in to such a mess.. But I did, and Im afraid it is going to take more than just a paper towel to clean up this spill.. He has no intention of ever leaving his wife.. He is not happy at home, and he is extremely bored… But he does not believe in divorce… (How can you believe in having an affair but not divorce?) Problem is… I am really stuck.. I love him, I feel lost when I am not with him, and frankly he has been the best man I have ever been with.. BUT I WANT OUT!!! I can no longer take playing 2nd best, or having to be quiet when he is on the phone, or having to wait by my phone for txt messages when they go on vacation and I cant see him.. I am a terrible person for what I have done, and I almost hate myself for it, as I should!! Never is it right to wreck someone elses world especially when there is no prize in the end.. I am sitting here in a dead end relationship becuase he is married, yet I am the one that gets made to feel like the dishonest one.. He gets very upset if I talk to other men and I do not tell him.. He has even started checking my e-mail… I don’t want comments back telling me Im stupid, and to just walk away.. I really am desperate for advice on how to walk away and not come back.. Please!!! Somebody help me… He will have it end with me thinking that I messed up.. I dont want it that way.. I want to walk away with a little of my dignity left… God, I am just so hurt by all of this.. If you can help.. I look forward to hearing from you..

  • At 8:04 pm on August 17, 2008, G's Girl commented:

    Well I just started sleeping with a married man about a month or more ago. He’s awesome. He has been married 26 yrs! Before me, he had a 6 year affair with another woman. He isnt happy at home and says Im the only person he can be himself with. I have even met his 22 yr old son who approves of his dads behaivor. I really didnt expect this, I thought it was going to be a one time thing. So did he, but we were wrong. We spend alot of time together and do insane things together. At home he is straight faced, very active in his church. With me hes a pot smoking, drinking, gun shooting redneck lol. I dont understand how he can be 2 totally different ppl in a days time. Im not looking for him to leave his wife, it will eventually happen we both know but it will be just cause they arent happy together not because of another woman or man. He lets me in soooo much of his life, all but meeting his wife lol. Thanks Gosh. I know we are headed down a dangerous path and it scares me!

  • At 4:32 pm on September 8, 2008, Brittany! commented:

    I’m in the same exact situation!! I’ve been sleeping with a married man for the past 3 months. He’s 36 years old. 14 years older than me. I work at the daycare that his babies go too and I’m with them everyday and been with them everyday since they were 6 weeks old. (they are now 2 years old .. his youngest being 3 months old) I’m very close to them and have always been close to him as well. He always brings the kids in the the dayacre, never his wife because she works so much. She only brings them in everyonce in a blue moon. He always knew everything about my personal life. When he would come in to drop the babies off, he would ask how my weekends were, what i did, if i met any guys. He knew EVERYTHING that went on in my life.. if i met a new guy, he knew about it. if i had a bad date, he knew about it and was always there as a shoulder to bitch on LOL. All the other girls that work at the daycare think he is gorgeous too. How can you not love a man in a suit? LOL..And he has the BEST personality. When his 3rd child was born a few months ago, he called me while his wife was in the hospital and asked me to come over. I was soo nervous but i couldnmt say no. Thats when it all started. I feel like the WORST person in the world for what I’m doing!!!! I’m not a slut! i never was … I was one of the most innocent girls you would ever meet! but temmptation took over! and now i’m deeply in love with him and cant pull myself out of this!! its so hard seeing him everday and taking care of his children everyday. He’s everything i could ever want. We talk alot on the phone and meet up every few weeks. He goes away alot for work and i’ll spend the night at the hotel with him. It so exciting and fun.. But i know hes not leaving his wife. And i would never want to break up there family because i do love his kids SOO MUCH and would never want them to grow up in a split household… i just dont know what to do!! :( I’m completely miserable when im not near him.. I cant imagine my life without him in it

  • At 6:52 pm on September 20, 2008, Kof commented:

    I just need to let it out. I bore three children with a man that I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. We both had a lot of growing to do. I never wanted to end the relationship but as we made a decision to move to ATL I gave him an out and he took it(he was becoming more and more distant so I figured he wanted out). Later he came to me and said he wanted to start over as a family in ATL. As I was looking for a place in ATL he found her while working in Florida. Unknowingly, I found out I was pregnant. He never told me that he was engaging in a long distance relationship with her. I started to dream about a woman in his life. The dreams became stronger and clearer. I confronted him. He lied. I confronted him. He lied. I confronted him. He finally tells me. At this time I am quite pregnant. He tells me that she is the one. Wow!!!! Can you say pain, boys and girls? Well, as the depression set in for a matter of years. She moves from California to ATL. She buys them a house (he is broke). They get married, and have a baby. He goes from driving a hoopty to a Beemer. Shame on me for not balling. Maybe he would have stayed :) [Sidebar: I just called her to tell her she never answers when I call she knows he still loves me!] Well, back to the story. She cultivated, sorry THEY cultivated a relationship knowing that WE had a baby on the way. Two years ago we started sleeping together….. I love him so much. But I obviously do not love me. I have asked him to leave me alone. I am not interested in continuing this empty relationship. He answers to this is to come over to spend the night. Well, I wanted him to but the temporary comfort does not keep the emptiness and pain from following hours after he leaves. He will not discuss their relationship. He comments that he is not going to destroy a house to build one. How funny. He destroyed our house. Now he wants our house back but wants to keep the one over in Lithonia. I feel the only way for him to understand that I want it all or nothing is to tell her. I believe human nature will cause him to attend to her and she will force him to leave me alone.

    Thank you for listening. I just needed to vent.
    I am so strong when I am mad and hurt, but he shows up and my body responds to what it knows will follow.

    I just emailed a copy of this to her.

  • At 1:59 pm on September 21, 2008, MegK commented:

    okay so i am a 19 year old sleeping with a married man, i had a relationship with him prior to him getting married but he had to get married in order to have the mother of his child get a green card. At first I broke up with him because well i was always told you know marriage is sacred, but he is everything I have ever looked for. I am so in love wtih him and the other day I gave in, and we slept together again. I know its wrong but at the same time..is it really? He really isnt in love with this woman, he just married her so she can live here and he can see his daughter (they lived in the Dominican Republic and he never ever saw them).

    Thanks for listening, just needed to write about it to you guys who kinda understand what I am going through

  • At 12:45 am on October 3, 2008, B+H commented:

    Wow…so many women with the same deal. Yes…I am one of you. I am addicted to him. He is wonderful. Almost perfect except for the cheating. I have tried to stop talking to him, but, he contacts me. I can’t seem to keep myself from answering.(rolling eyes) What can I say? I know its wrong. I absolutely know he will never leave his wife. I will never ask him to. He has children. I could never take their family away from them. They love him. They look up to him. A lot of people in our community look up to him. He really is amazing.
    I feel lucky and guilty and sad and passionate and in love and scared. There are so many feelings. Too many. Wish we could be together more often. Both our schedules don’t allow the kind of time we would like to spend with each other. I also am a parent. Not making the best choices here. I know. I also have a reputation to uphold in this community. I am the nice person. The good and kind person. This is totally out of character for either one of us. But here we are. Did we set out for it to happen? No. Could we have ignored it? Yes. But for once…I wanted to feel what it was like to be with someone like him. It is bliss. Every wonderful moment. Pure bliss. No matter what pain comes from this. I will always remember our blissful, passionate, perfect moments together. He has taught me what I want in a man..Minus the cheater of course. But if a man I was with cheated on me…wouldn’t that be karma biting me in the ass?! It is what it is.

  • At 6:19 pm on October 21, 2008, I was just wondering? commented:

    Forget about their families and I am not passing any judgements because everyone has something. But for one second can you think how would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot and your husband was with another woman?

  • At 6:24 pm on October 21, 2008, Curious commented:

    Do these married men still love their wives? Do they tell you ladies this or do they just want to &*^( you?

  • At 10:01 pm on October 24, 2008, same scirpt commented:

    I’m about to get married in one month, my fiance cheated on me last year and we decided to work it out. In the middle of that I met a man at work, who I was very attracted to. He is married and knows I’m about to get married. But the attraction was very strong. We emailed and called and it turned into lunch dates and sneaking away to meet for just a moment. We are now sleeping together with an agreement that the intimate level will end once I get married. I know it’s wrong and I’ve always talked bad about women who sleep with married men since my fiance cheated on me. But this man is so wonderful to me! I know he loves his wife and family as I love mine. But he wants to be there for me, take care of me, and love me. Why should I turn that down? I dont want him to leave his wife, and I would never leave my fiance but I know what this other man means to me and what I mean to him. And who knows maybe this is just Karma coming around to kick my fiance in the ass because I never cheated on him before he cheated on me. I know that doesn’t justify anything but that’s just the way MY SITUATION is

  • At 9:57 pm on October 27, 2008, AStrayOne commented:

    I’m sleeping with a 30 year old married man, I’m 23. He works at a few bars and I’ve always seen him when my friends and I were out. One night 2 summers ago I got the guts (and by guts I mean i drank alot that night…) to talk to him, we exchanged numbers, and started to see each other when the night at the bar was over…I found out though a mutual friend he was married about 2 months into it…and swore him off…but then continued to see him. He also ended up living down the block from me, which makes it all the more convenient…I know that this relationship wont go anywhere, but i can’t help loving the fact that he’d rather sleep with me than go home to have sex wtih his wife…he makes me feel pretty and good and wanted…and I make him feel good and wanted also. I keep telling myself that if I dont expect anything, no one (me, really) will get hurt.

  • At 2:38 pm on October 30, 2008, Anonymous commented:

    I’ve been sleeping with a married man for almost a year and a half. I met him through work. At first it was just sex, but now it is so much more. He practically lives with me, stays the night every night. He gives me every thing I could ever want and more. I’ve never once had to wonder where he is, what he’s doing, when is he going to call, because he always does. He’s always there for me. He says him and his wife are more like roommates, they don’t talk, kiss, have sex, nothing. But they do have two children, and that is the main reason why they are still married. She’s never once called him wondering where he is when he’s at my house, and I’ve seen emails she has sent him and text messages and they all point to divorce. And he has told me that by this time next year that he will be divorced and that we will be together. He just recently started saying those things, but I just don’t know. I ended things with him about a week ago because I’m not sure I want to be involved when the whole divorce thing comes around. He promised me that he would prove me wrong and that we will be together. So far every day since we stopped talking he’s left little reminders of himself around my office or at my house, a card, flowers, a note, etc. I honestly think him and I will happen, but I just can’t deal with all the guilt right now. (aka, people on my case every day about how wrong it is). So what do you think??? Should I stick it out with him or should I let him deal with this stuff alone and in the end if it’s meant to be he will come back to me?

  • At 11:30 pm on November 23, 2008, Mia commented:

    What started as innocent flirting with my contractor turned into pure sexual desire. I am so attracted to this man the way he talks…smells. I don’t want anything, but hot steamy sex from him. It’s this animalistic urge I don’t want to fight. I know he is married, but I feel like that is his thing not mine. I wouldn’t cheat if I was in a relationship…I would leave, but I feel detached from his relationship. I don’t know her.

    After months of mutual flirting we made out and messed around. I told my friends about it and one who just got engaged blew up at me. She told me how I was wrong and that she couldn’t believe what I was doing…she was disappointed. I feel like that is her crap…her fears for her own relationahip that she is putting on me. She told me she would be mad at me if I slept with him and she just did not want to hear anything else. I get it, but at the same time am pissed she is judging me. What means something to one person might not to someone else. I have always held my relationships and others in high reguard. I didn’t think I would be in this position, but now that I am it does not feel wrong. I can’t get my head wrapped around why that is, but it is. I’m still not sure what I will do, but I feel like sex is natural and what I am doing is not wrong for me.

  • At 9:57 pm on November 25, 2008, Thetruthasis commented:

    So I must say, if you are going to break the rules,…break them right. If you can’t hang then you shouldn’t play the game…what does this mean? #1 He’s not going to leave his wife. Stop asking yourself why he would be with you if he’s happy at home. Yes its true he’s not happy at home but he also has a great non committed SEXUAL relationship with someone who knows he’s married so just has to take it. (for clarity purposes that person just mention is U!) So question answered “free sex and an ear” is why he comes to you. (yes it is the reason, the truth will set you free) #2 Yea ok, so he’s everything you want…wait..except SINGLE. You wanted a single man, why would you actually want someone who can’t keep a promise. No you’re not the one, your just the one right now, trust you’re probably not the first affair and you probably won’t be the last. #3 Does everyone notice that everyone is saying almost the exact same thing, I mean there are some differences, but is everyone sleeping with the same married man??? Ummm, clearly married men that cheat all have a way of rationalizing their actions to themselves, and you, cause all of the married men mentioned here are saying the same thing. Now, if you can not handle anything that has been posted here and you are pondering having an affair, clearly you are not ready nor should you enter into this. Now for the women who really are just guys underneath, (meaning you really have that uncanny ability to get it and go when its time) its a different story and you have to be accountable to your own conscious for that one. But for everyone else, who is sooooo in love, go to a club, bar, or speed dating, and find you someone single who will occupy you’re time and take your mind off of this Married “never gonna leave their wife, screwing you because you have a vagina and an ear” Man. Please, in love, I’m afraid to say that it is so late for someone who decided to fall in love with a married man. Maybe its not too late though, get strenght to say, “Ummm, yea, how about no this time, how about I go do something with my life instead screw you” Oh and DO NOT worry about his feelings, he’s not worrying about yours when he goes to kiss his wife GOODNIGHT!
    -Spoken by one of your own…

  • At 9:44 am on November 29, 2008, sarah commented:

    I have to say you ladies are pathetic. i cant believe your all fucking married men. When i think of the children he has at home , and you not thinking about that ,or not thinking ur the reason who might break that little boys family apart is just disgusting, how could you guys look at yourself in the mirror. i think its just self esteem. you have none. once you get some self esteem like i do , then you know how wrong and pathetic it is. you women have no morals what’s so ever. YOu make me sick!!

  • At 10:00 am on November 29, 2008, yasmine commented:

    i once had a best friend who was sleeping with a married man. i decided to end the friendship , a friend who is capable of sleeing with a man shows you a lot about her , she cant be trusted who’s to say she wont be fucking your husband. im just saying if your wlling to be fucking a married, prepare to lose friends , prefer to have people look down on you,prepare to be called a homewrecker, slut and a whore every now and then. is that really worth it. think about it.

  • At 10:17 pm on December 20, 2008, Marie commented:

    Falling in love is something u just can NOT do unless he first leaves his wife. If you can’t handle that emotionally…do NOT get involved. I have been sleeping with a married man for 3 mos now, and I have done this before…some of you understand…it’s exciting, and the draw is just too strong, ut again…you just can not fall in love. They almost neevr leave their wives no matter how miserable they are or they claim to be.
    Call “us” what you will…we exist, and calling us slut/whore…whatever is not gonna make us go “OMG! SHe’s right!” and stop. lol. SIlly.
    All I know is when he goes down on me, or I on him, or he’s inside of me…knowing that he’s not suposed to be, or I’m not suposed to….it is so super hott.

  • At 1:48 pm on December 22, 2008, tee commented:

    Y is every on blaming her. What about him??? Oh that’s how women treat women

  • At 11:26 am on December 30, 2008, Carole commented:

    How come there are no men here telling us they are sleeping with married women??’Its a mans world. they have the best of it. A stupid woman at home to clean,cook, feed, generally be their domestic slave and look after their offspring. And another stupid woman to fulfil their sexual needs, and boost their egos. Which one of these women are you? I know which one I would prefer to be.

  • At 1:14 am on January 15, 2009, I don't know anymore commented:

    I am 19 and I slept with a married man. It was so crazy..he is 33 and I am not in love with him at all but he is so sexy I can’t help it, when I see him everyday at school. He is one of my instuctors and this situation is very f^&*ed up I know. But he continues to contact me and wants this too…I told him I was comfortable with it but when ever he wanted to stop I would respect it because he has threee children and is in his second marriage.I was so scared at first and I told him I didn’t want to do it if he was going to drop me afterwards and disrepsect me and what do you know he kept his promise. I visit him in is office some days but I am really nervous around him because I like him so much. I know this is all kind of scrambled together but yesterday I was in a wreck and he called me to ask if I was ok and how I was feeling…I felt really awkward because I was with my family and here I am talking to this man who can’t seem to leave me. I don’t know what to do…I eventually wanna quit because as I get older I know I won’t want this at all and I do believe in karma and it sucks that I put myself in this position…and it is my fault but his too because he felt the same…but then again wouldn’t any older man want to sleep with a younger woman? exactly

  • At 5:57 pm on January 18, 2009, been there, done that. commented:

    I am am very attractive middle age woman who had been in a bad marriage for too many years. I met a married man online, emailed/talked on phone for a couple of months and at first it was just friendly, but things became increasingly flirtatious. When we finally did meet over lunch, the chemistry was off the charts. We continued to chat for a few more weeks, did lunch, went hiking, before we talked and decided to become “playmates.” It went on and off for some eight months, but after two months it caused me more pain than pleasure. We always met and did things on his terms, and then he would occasionally “disappear” for one or two weeks.” Unfortunately, I was very lonely and somewhat needy and really fell for him. He claimed he loved his wife, but that she was cold and not interested in sex. How do I know if this was the truth? And then after the last time I saw him for a sexual rendezvous which was fun, he faded out and disappeared without so much as a “goodbye.” Very hurtful. Having an affair with a married man is like riding an emotional roller coaster. It is too problematic, and a waste of time. I agree with the writer above, that women who get involved and put up with a married man have low self esteem, and if you are married with problems yourself, it is a band aide solution. Deception all around and the potential to hurt a lot of people, not the least of which is, yourself.

  • At 3:59 pm on January 27, 2009, Nilly commented:

    I’m not really sure how I feel about the whole situation. I’ am 23 and recently sleep with a married man in his thirties. I knew he had a wife and constantly refused his advances because I felt it was soooo wrong !!! However one night I just couldn’t hold back from temptation I thought it was such a mistake … he didn’t seem to think so. He wants to keep meeting up with and I think he is so hot and I do like to messs around with him but i just know its bad news! However no women can sit here on a high horse and tell me that i have low self esteem or that I am a homewreaker or slut because I am none of those things. I have everything going for me and yet i can’t keep away from him. So i say as long as you don’t get emotionaly involved its ok and oh … don’t knock it till you try it .

  • At 11:04 pm on January 29, 2009, kh commented:

    I am 18 and I think that I may be headed down the same path. My boss almost constantly flirts with me, touches me, etc, and I cannot refuse his advances. He is ridiculously attractive, and I know completely that I would never want anything other than sex from him, and I’m positive he feels the same way.
    I’m torn because on one hand I want to live my life, experience as much as I can and regret as little as possible. On the other, I don’t want to be a homewrecker, a slut, a whore.
    Co-workers are beginning to catch on, as is his wife, whom I have met.
    My boss and I made plans to start going to the gym together - and I think that this could easily be the beginning of a very slippery slope.

  • At 11:28 pm on February 4, 2009, confused commented:

    I was in a long distance relationship for almost six years and I barely got to see that person. A friend of my manager’s would come in every couple weeks and he (my manager’s friend) caught me staring at him one day and gave me his email. From then on I have been seeing him and he practically lives down the street from me. He told me straight away he was married and I didn’t care. The sex was amazing… the most amazing sex I had ever had. It made me feel ill to hear about past experiences he had had (not sure why? maybe I thought I was special or something??).
    Anyway, my (now) exboyfriend calls me up complaining that I am sick for sleeping with a married man and tries to make me think about how his wife would feel. I often ignore it because I love the sex (that sounds very terrible). Now I am wanting more from this because I miss having an actual relationship.. someone to care for me. Now the married guy says he only wants friends with benefits and nothing more. I guess I’m the idiot… I threw away what I wanted (even if the sex was just mediocre…) and now I can’t get it back. Was this a terrible decision? I was not thinking with my brain at the time.. just with my sexual urges.
    This should end soon, shouldn’t it?

  • At 12:09 am on February 9, 2009, Sam commented:

    Yes, end it. And not just you — all of you, ladies. If you get it’s just about sex, fine. Have the sex but without expectations or forming any attachment (pretty hard to do). If you hope for more, I’m afraid the odds are that you’re not going to get it. If he loves you, needs you, he will seek you out and keep seeking you out after you’ve broken it off. The thing is the guy has all the power here. He gets to dazzle you and leave, go back to the wife and kids, to home, to comfort. You ladies have no power or very little (apart from sex). That can be alluring, maybe. You get to long for him, for love. So many of us prefer longing for love to actually having it. It can take up years of our lives, trying, chasing, pursuing, persuading, when we should be getting clear and finding a 50-50 partner, a lover and a friend. It’s worth holding out for something reciprocal, something that feels like home.

  • At 6:27 pm on February 13, 2009, sarah commented:

    iv been working at a new job for about 5 months, a manager at the company has always been a huge flirt i thought nothing much of it, he was just a laugh to talk to. Until that is until last week he got serious one day and gave me his number and told me to text him mine. i was completly shocked and i tried to turn it into a joke and laugh it off but he was serious. i took his number but i havnt gave him mine or called him! yet that is! Since then im growing more and more attracted to him, i see him everyday and often im alone with him. I dont know what to do to stop it happening. i know its going to happen and i know it will more then likely end in tears but i know im still going to do something i really shouldnt. Gosh this is crazy im only 24 he is 36 not married but living with some and has a child with her. what the hell am i thinking!!!

  • At 12:41 pm on February 16, 2009, Trish commented:

    I am currently seeing a married man who will never leave home for me. Actually, I would not leave home for him. If I were single, I would not be dating him period. The problem is that I have fallen for him and I don’t know how to let go but I must. My husband found out about the affair and wants to work things out. I still can’t let go of my lover!

  • At 3:42 am on February 27, 2009, katrina commented:

    This is interesting to read. Not that I thought that I was the only one, but that so many people say it’s ok - until you get emotionally involved. Two weeks ago I slept with my boss after a very drunken night. I’m 32 and single, he’s 41 with a partner and two children. We met a few days later where I was fully prepared to put it down to a drunken, foolish thing that would never happen again. I mean, I’m not a slut, a homewrecker, a whore, I’m not even someone that would sleep with a co-worker let alone my boss. However he wants to continue, say’s I’m ‘under his skin’ and he can’t stop thinking about me and has for the past two years. I really don’t know what to do. If I’m honest with myself I have had feelings for him for a long time, but I’m not the sort of person to f*&£ my boss, or a married man and told him that straight up. He said they were his worries, not mine (true… I’m single, but I do have morals, so not so true after all). I did ask him why he was with his partner when he clearly stepped outside of that relationship semi-regularly and his excuse was that they don’t have sex, touch or have any affection, but it’s for the kids. I don’t get this. I don’t think you’re being a better role model for kids by staying together and being miserable and uncomunicative, than if you separate. Anyway, to cut a boring story short, I’m considering going for it. The sexual attraction is undeniable, and if we can keep it between ourselves, then we’re not actively hurting anyone other than ourselves. Still, men are pussies. They should face up to the facts and deal with change and what it brings, rather than trying to have the best of both worlds.

  • At 11:41 am on March 29, 2009, Chillin in San Diego commented:

    Well I’m not sleeping with anyone who’s married however, I did meet this chap online very randomly and we’ve been chatting here and there pretty much everyday. We didn’t meet under romantic pretenses at all although I have to say when he told me he had two kids with his former wife and a current girlfriend that he’s been with for a year I have to admit that I did feel a tad disappointed. He must’ve noticed because he poked a little fun at me for it…He was like, why so sad, what were YOU thinking about. I have to admit he had said he was just looking to make friends as he’s not from here. So I realligned my expectations and stuck him in the friend section of my brain.

    However, us trying to catch each other on our phones whenever we get a free minute has been a little cute I have to admit. And it’s gotten progressively more flirtatious. He lives not 5 miles from me and one night he invited me over because he said the curiousity is killing him. I got out of 4 year relationship last year. Sex has been minimal to none and Im unbelievable pent up and frustrated and the way things have been going I feel like all he would have to do is touch me and Id be all over it….I’m still pretty heartbroken over the situation with my ex and Id hate to put another girl through any kind of heartbreak but I catch myself justifying with thoughts like, well they’re not married…..and we dont KNOW that we’d have sex, and even if we do I’ve been sad and I neeeed this right now. I dont know what’s wrong with me right now….

  • At 2:35 pm on April 1, 2009, Anonymous commented:

    Well again, here is another story much like the others that I have read, I am not sure how I ended up in this situtation. My husband traveled out of town alot and I got really close to a coworker who was also married. We worked together for about a year and a half, and then we started having to do work projects together and he opened a workout gym so I started to go there just so I could be around him and then one day we slept together, and it was Great, and so now we have been seeing each other for almost 5 months. He says that he is not happy at home but he does not know if he can leave, I am ready to leave my husband just so that I can be with him. When we are together she is constantly calling or texting him trying to figure out what he is doing. And he always goes running back to her and he can never just stand up to her and tell her no. I am so tired of being alone and hurt and I feel like I do everything I can to try to be with him and I don’t get that back from him. He told me last night that he and his wife were going to go to counseling, and it broke my heart and I told him our friendship and relationship was over. That was really hard for me to say. I have to sit in the same office with him everyday and it has been really really hard for me not to send him an email or just talk to him. I am hurting so bad right now and he acts like nothing has even changed or happened. I really need help, if anybody can help me or has any suggestions please let me know.

  • At 11:01 pm on April 4, 2009, dazed commented:

    I am also in one of these situations mine is pretty complicated because of my job and until last week my husband and i worked at the exact same place just different shifts. Well my husband was cheating on me and i use to vent to this one guy at work. He is married but he always tried to make me feel better. Well we started flirting and ended up sleeping together twice while my husband was out of town. He is 15 yrs older than i am and well we still flirt a little but all this happened a couple months ago and now we are just friends it didnt get messy or anything. I should probally mention that he is in my supervision and he was also seeing a woman in his supervision. Well recently mu husband and i seperated and our going through a divorce and he recently got moved to a different shop (i still see him because his shop comes to ours sometimes to help fix our planes). There is another guy who is newer to our shop and he is also in my supervision and again 15yrs older than i am. He has flirted with me innocently pretty much since he got here. Well i started flirting back not to long ago. I sent him a text saying that i was gonna steal his tanning bed (we always joke about my tan lines and i tell him that i blame him for them cause he has a tanning bed) and he replied that i had to use it nude because that is how uses it. I told that was fine and thats how i always use tanning beds, his reply was asking if he could take pics. well one thing lead to another and the next week we exchanged photos. that same day we went out to a plane to work on it (it was just us on that plane) and ended up kissing and stuff. We havent actually slept together yet but i want to. i know he wont leave his wife and im not asking him too. i know that our relationship will just be sexual and im cool with that. he has made most of the advances and he is just so hard to resist. he has this quirky little smile that he does that i cant resist. i think about him alot and really just want to f*&#^ him but it is hard to find the time and a place to do it. i just dont want to get caught cause that would really suck for our careers. my friends at work our nosy and love playing with my phone so i am always careful to delete our texts but he did give me a worried look the other day when a guywas looking at my phone. i tried to give him a reassuring look that everything was ok but who knows. agh i just needed to get all that off my chest

  • At 12:03 am on April 9, 2009, Grace commented:

    To Anonymous from April 1: You need some support. Can you find a therapist? Do you have a friend or two you can confide in? Is it possible to leave this job, this man for good, or do economic circumstances make it too hard? You did the right thing by breaking it off, and now you need to help yourself commit to that right decision by keeping centered and getting some solid back-up in the form of friends and family or a change of circumstances or by treating yourself with better care than ever? Can you do that? Are you willing to?

  • At 12:07 am on April 9, 2009, Grace commented:

    Dazed: Look how much pain a lot of the women here are in because they got involved with married men. Do you really want to do that to yourself for the sake of short-term thrills? Sex for women gets emotional at some point or another. It’s hard for us to keep it strictly defined, and many of us would rather long for love than have it and do the work of maintaining a solid, trusting relationship. It’s work and most of us don’t want the work, just the easy stuff (sex), until suddenly it’s not easy at all and we’re in acres of bad feeling and self-loathing.

  • At 2:16 pm on April 13, 2009, Suzette commented:

    Wow, there’s a lot of people sleeping with married men! But I agree with a lot of the posters. There’s always the risk of sex getting emotional. We shouldn’t approach it with the mindset of “Oh, it’s okay, that’ll never happen,” because once upon a time we also thought “that’ll never be me” about sleeping with a married man. Total hypocrite here, but yea. It needs to stop. Just because it feels good or right unfortunately doesn’t mean it is good or right. Sigh. Such is life.

  • At 11:32 am on April 17, 2009, Pissed Off WIFE commented:

    Of all the available men in the world, why choose a MARRIED one? Seriously. You all are a bunch of hard up nasty SLUTS. Go find your own man and leave the ones who are already taken alone!

  • At 9:13 pm on April 29, 2009, Anonymous commented:

    Re: Pissed Off WIFE et al -

    Why are the women involved at fault? Granted, a relationship with a married man is morally and ethically wrong. There aren’t many threads here that are arguing otherwise. But “hard up nasty SLUTS”? Has your husband been cheating on you with one of us? Is that why you are so hostile?

    Sleeping with a married man isn’t right. Regardless of the reason - sex, self-esteem issues, plain and simple loneliness - it still doesn’t make it right. But it is the men we should be faulting the most in this case. If you want to call anybody a slut, point that accusation at a man who is willing to forgo his commitment to a wife who loves him, to children who depend upon him, to treat a (traditionally much younger) girl with clear emotional fallacies of her own like someone who is disposable. I, for one, hate myself enough for this current affair that you couldn’t possibly call me a name that I do not already call myself. I trust the same goes for most who find themselves in a similar lot. But it is so easy to blame the women. It is so easy to get pissed off and categorize all of us into cheap or hopeless or heartless or whorish.
    I understand that it must be much easier to do that then it is to look at the man you are married to and realize not only is he doing irreparable damage to your heart and mind, but is guiltless enough to be simultaneously doing the same sort of damage to a mere girl. Foolish as she may be, he is the “hard up nasty slut” - in your words, not mine - and you are the pitiable woman married to him.

  • At 11:50 pm on April 30, 2009, Kelly commented:

    It’s not hard to say no to a married man if you have morals. I was constantly getting hit on by my sexy ups guy ( I get a lot of packages since I run my own business.) In any case, he finally gave me his number and I called him. After not answering the phone at night, and only during the day when he was working I started getting suspicious. I asked him if he was married and he said yes. And then he went on to say he cant stop thinking about me, he has never felt this before, he can’t believe a girl like me is single. At first I was flattered, that this guy was practically stalking my home and so into me. Then I realized hes a married pig who probably uses that sleazy approach with many woman. I refused to enable a cheater, and if all women did the same there would be a lot less broken marriages!

  • At 2:29 am on May 5, 2009, Anonymous commented:

    Re: Kelly

    Nothing is as simple as “having [sic] morals” or not. A woman intelligent enough to run her own business ought to have learned that by now.

  • At 10:41 pm on June 17, 2009, lust not love commented:

    I used to be that girl that thought they would never mess around with a guy that had a girlfriend, and a married guy was never even thought about b/c that was just never goin to happen. i looked down of all the women who did that… i mean i kinda still do but now i’m included in those women now which i am in no way proud of but it is what it is now. I’m got a sticky situation on my hands. I started talking to my ex’s good friend behind his back b/c my ex and i are still really good friends and i didn’t want to hurt him. After hanging out with this guy for a little i found out he had a g/f, she lived far away and they had only been dating for a little while so i did’t think much of it. (still felt bad though) So it went on for alittle and i found out that he was actually engaged to her. I flipped out and stopped talking to him for a little didn’t tell him why though. So i finally decided i was going to tell her. So i sent her an email. she sent one back saying i was lying and was probably some girl he had turned down and he would never cheat on her. I then found out they were getting married that week. After i sent the email i never told him i sent it, but he told me we could no longer sleep together but we could still be friends this was all 5 days before they were married. So they got married i left him alone. ONE WEEK after they are married he sends me a message saying he had been avoiding telling me something b/c he didn’t want it to ruin our friendship but he had gotten married last weekend. we talked about it i flipped out on him and i was willing to just be friends and see each other whenever our paths crossed. Then his wife couldn’t move down here for at least another month b/c their apartment isn’t ready for them so as he is driving back from their honeymoon he texts me. Since then i’ve tried not to talk to him… not to see him but it never works i cave b/c i enjoy talking to him and seeing him. So he has been married 2 weeks and is already cheating on his wife. i don’t understand it at all. i know everything will change once she is moved here and i am willing to leave him to his life as soon as he wants me to. but now no one except for my girlfriends know about our relationship( if you can even call it that) b/c no one knows we even talk non the less are sleeping together. it sucks but i can’t just walk away for whatever reason yet.

  • At 10:34 am on June 28, 2009, Anonymous commented:

    I’m 18 years old and sleeping with a 38 year old married man. We’ve been sleeping together and seeing each other on a weekly basis for about 8 months, and it doesnt look like it’s ending any time soon. I didn’t know he was married, I met him on a weekend out at the clubs, he was a police officer on duty and I stopped to say hello and we swapped numbers. That’s when it all started. I know it’s going nowhere, not only because he’s married but because of the age difference, and I know it’s wrong but I can’t pull myself away…

  • At 2:26 am on July 2, 2009, JES commented:

    I went on vacation in South America, and had an affair with a married man for a month… It was love or lust at first sight and we are still in touch… He claims he going to leave her nad move out… but i don’t expect him too. We will see if its meant to be… I had no idea he was married when i met him, he told me the day before i left back to the states… I was shocked but it’s too late my heart is attached.

  • At 7:49 pm on July 4, 2009, foolish girl commented:

    im seeing a man 10 years old then me. He’s not married but living with gf of 15 yrs and 2 very young children. I dont know how or why i got myself into this situation. we work for the same company, hes a high up powerful manager & im just a twenty something girl in an office. i dont know why im doing this its just got out of hand, it went from innocent banter & flirting to seedy sex in his house while she’s on holiday and his kids sleep upstairs. i dont know why im doing this i fear if anyone were to find out it would ruin my life id most definatly loose my job and for what? i cant justify my actions by claiming to love this man. i dont want him, i dont love him i feel nothing for him whatsoever, i guess i just loved the attention i felt addicted to it at first and ive just let the situation expand and get out of hand. i need to get out before it blows up in my face, but how i have no idea :(

  • At 4:05 pm on July 5, 2009, emma commented:

    ….I was once a girl who thought women who slept with married men were damn right ’slutty’ and ‘homewreckers’…I’m afraid i’m eating my words.I have been sleeping with a married man for 2 months, for the 1st month i kept saying no, i wasn’t this person, this isn’t for me…eventually i gave in, and i’m hating myself everyday. I do have morals, i am not a slut, i’m a 25 year old girl who is what some would call ‘level headed’ and ’strong’.I’m questioning myself everyday, when i go to bed at night i have to pray that nothing bad will happen to me. I decided tonight that this will end, it hasn’t been to long so i guess im one of the ‘lucky’ ones.But to all those women that have been a ‘bit on the side’ for years, how do you do it???? I can barely eat, sleep or function, the guilt is just too much to bear……I always knew this wasn’t the sort of thing i’d do.I’m hoping i’ll move on from this, i believe everything happens for a reason in life, but this really isn’t a path im going to pursue!…I also hope with what dignity i have left, that i can learn from this, it really is low shit, but men i do blame, they can reel you right in!!!!! So this is it, i’m going to find a nice bloke, a boring bloke even, but at least i know that what we have will be ours!!…My advice to any woman sleeping with a married man…..move on girl, find yourselves, and then your true night in shining armour will come and find you xxxxx

  • At 8:01 pm on July 6, 2009, Jisella commented:

    I’ve been in this situation too. Slept with a married man that I met at work. It’s stupid. Get out. Get out now. You are all in for such a huge regret and heartbreak. If I could take it all back I would. I wish I never wasted a SECOND on this guy. And they will never leave their wife. They don’t want to. Don’t you guys get it? If they really did, then they would have already. He doesn’t love you, I think he just loves the way you make him feel honestly. Guys think with two heads. The one that comes first isn’t the one with the brain in it of course. Just listen to me and RUN. It’s a complete waste of time and not only will you get heartbroken, you will feel shitty, sleazy, dirty, trashy, and every possible negative thing there is. It’s NOT worth it.

  • At 12:52 pm on August 5, 2009, way smarter than you all ...sluts commented:

    All you women are gross to be blunt. these men are just using you and whoever lets them you women better get some self esteem boost because you all have none he wont leave his wife and his wife comes first and your always gunna be on the back burner its not worth it its just gunna make you look like a crazy bitch so keep your legs closed to married men its the right thing to do dont be stupid little sluts cause noone will respect you.

  • At 10:37 am on August 18, 2009, Karen commented:

    Wow that is such a harsh judgment to have about these people. You are such a bitch and your own husband has probably finally had an eye opening revelation, and now he is out fucking the neighbor, or the check out girl at the local convenience store, and that is why you are so pissed off about their judgement.

    I am currently “fooling around” with 3 different married men and to be quite honest I don’t feel bad for these women. It isn’t my fault that they are going somewhere else to get their dicks sucked, it is theirs. All of the men have been married for 14+ years, their wives wooed them, got them to fall madly in love with them, then they couldn’t seal the deal and keep them interested. That is not my problem. All these men completely love their wives, but they no longer have any desire to have sex with their husbands. Maybe if they would satisfy them at home they wouldn’t have to come to me to get what they want.

  • At 9:18 pm on August 30, 2009, Michigan_Girl commented:

    Reading all of these stories, my heart is just wrenching. I’ve known this man since I was starting high school and for years he’s been very fatherly to me. At first, I felt like he was hitting on me and by all means, I kind of didn’t mind. He’s an extremely, EXTREMELY, attractive! He’s every thing I was ever looking for, just married and roughly 13 years older. I’m even good friends with his wife, and I still can’t believe they’re married. All he talks about is how much being married sucks. He has a 10 year old daughter with his wife as well and she’s friends with my little sister. I see him all the time and we spend a lot of time together, especially lately now that I’ve had a falling out when it comes to relationships. This man is best friends with my dad, by the way. We talk and every thing, like my father and I do. Just recently, we kissed. Not only kissed, we made-out pretty intensely, he felt me up pretty much… Just out of the blue, this has happened. We fortunately haven’t had sex or anything like that. I’m so excited that this is happening, but I feel HORRIBLE that I, being so young and rebound, fell into the arms of my dad’s best MARRIED friend (whose wife is awesome, but if she found out, she would attempt to kill me… I am not over-exaggerating, thats her personality)! I do like him, a lot. I loved him as a fatherly/older figure in my life, but I’m not in love with him. He recently told me he loves me, but it was unclear if he meant in love or just loved me as a person. I’m intensely physically attracted to him, I can’t deny that. He tells me I started all of this, even though he made the first move. Although, thinking about it, my playful banter, hugging, and talking specifically to him probably WAS the initial spark to the fire, even if I didn’t think anything of it. For years I’ve had this mindset of him and now it’s completely upside down. I always want to touch him, look at him, talk to him… There’s this part of me that’s ripping me apart though. If ANYONE found out, it would ruin my life and most definately his life. All for lust? I don’t know if it’s only lust, he might actually have feelings for me. If he does, this situation is tripled! I’m so scared that we’re going to get caught, but at the same time every time he touches me or kisses me, I love it. Either because I’ve liked him and/or infatuated with him (had a childish girly crush even) for so long that its a sigh of relief that he is showing these feelings towards me… I guess I don’t want advice… I guess I just needed to tell SOMEONE since I can never tell anyone.

  • At 7:35 pm on September 4, 2009, Suzanne commented:

    I too have been sleeping with a married man for 6 years now. I know it’s wrong and all but I fell in love with him. I know he will never leave his wife and I accept it but I am so attached to him and I don’t know how to walk away! The sex is beyond amazing and we laugh all the time. At times I feel guilty but I’m not the one who is married. Why is it that the woman always gets blamed??He is the one who is breaking his vows.

    Everytime I want to break away from him he pulls me back in . I will never tell his wife because it’s not her fault but I just wish he told me the first time I met him that he was married. He waited until I got attached to him and then told me!!

    I hope one day I can say It’s over because in the end this relationship is purely sexual and I want more than that for myself.

  • At 3:27 pm on September 13, 2009, Suzanne commented:

    I just want to say that I have finally ended it with the married man that I was sleeping with for the past 6 years and Ladies it feels great. He cheated on me with other women and I realized that all it was was amazing sex and fun times but he will never leave his wife and he is a scumbag for doing what he is doing . I am not a saint and I guess it’s my karma that’s biting me in the ass.

    For all the ladies who are in a relationship with a married man…GET OUT NOW!! It is so not worth it. f they are doing this to someone they shared vows with what do you think he will do to you?

    I know it is a process and I will hurt for awhile but what I was going through while I was with him was much worse.

    Loving a man that was emotionally unavaileble to love me back.

    I know that this will be hard to overcome but in the end I will be happier even if it means being alone.

    I can do bad all by myself! Don’t need a man to make me feel less than what I am.

    Good luck to all the ladies out there int he same situtation!

  • At 8:35 am on September 15, 2009, Anonymous commented:

    I am also sleeping with a married man. Its been more than a year now and the guilt is killing me I want someone to tell me how do I get out of this relationship without it destroying me.

  • At 8:36 am on September 15, 2009, desperate for a change commented:

    I am also sleeping with a married man. Its been more than a year now and the guilt is killing me I want someone to tell me how do I get out of this relationship without it destroying me.

  • At 7:37 pm on September 15, 2009, melissa commented:

    i too have been having an affair with a married man 11 years my junior. He is a wonderful guy. I know it is wrong because I was married before and on the receiving end of an affair. This time in my life this feels right. I dont expect anyone to understand how I feel but its true. I will admit that the worst part of it is that at night he goes home to her. I dont know where this is headed but right now it is the right place for me.

  • At 10:17 pm on September 17, 2009, nothere commented:

    If you think it is all his fault, you’re delusional. You are equally culpable. If you think he’ll leave his wife, you’re delusional. He probably won’t. If you think he loves you, you’re delusional. He clearly does not even understand love. If you think it’s okay, you are delusional. It is not; we all know this. Pretend to disagree.

    I’m having something of an affair with a married man. Same profile as most of yours– more than a decade older, [former] colleague. I certainly never planned it, but I didn’t resist. I know it’s wrong and I do it anyway. We will have to answer for ourselves eventually. I’d like to say I don’t know why I do this, or that I “can’t help myself” but I do and I can. I like that there is no bull&*(#. He feeds me a line, I call him out. I say everything out loud because I don’t worry how he’ll take it; I don’t wonder what he’s thinking; see, I just don’t care enough. I am not in love with him, he is not in love with me. We like each other, and we like sleeping with each other. I highly doubt I am the first (probably why his first wife bailed?), I will likely not be the last.

    Life is all about choices, after all, and we have to be willing to own up to ours. We keep making the choice to do what is wrong. We are broken people relying on broken people to provide us with love, acceptance, whatever. It is self-destructive. This will be a regret, indeed.

  • At 9:54 am on September 24, 2009, havingahardtime commented:

    I to am in a relationship with a married man and I have never felt so bad in my life. I cry everyday that he doesn’t call. I sit by the phone hoping he will call me . I think about him when i got to sleep and when i wake up. I need to stop this madness because he will never leave his wife and I will always be 2nd or 3rd. I can’t take the way I am feeling and I feel like no one recognizes me anymore . I never used to be so sad and depressed all the time and no out going cause I am always waiting for him to call or come around!! I need to get out this this mess fast because I don’t know how much more I can take….

  • At 11:43 pm on September 24, 2009, Flower commented:

    I slept with a married man (who is one of my bosses. We had sex a couple of times. I started feeling bad about it for the past week or so but we were still talking. I just found out yesterday that he also has something going on with another co worker from the office who is also a good friend of mine….she doesn’t know what happened between us but after I found out what he had going on with her I felt even worse and a little hurt at the same time but you know what? I asked for it! Now I feel terrible, it’s not worth it. I am very upset and very disappointed in myself as well for doing what I did. But the good thing about it is that I’ve learned from this mistake and that is something that I will never go through again.

  • At 9:27 am on October 20, 2009, meg commented:

    I was involved with a married man 7 mths ago, who is also my relative. I am ‘lucky’ enough to say that the complicated relationship just last for 6 mths. I don’t want to go through all the details again. what i want to say is…it started and happen so nice and happy and we didnt even know that we attracted to each other …then things go wrong when we each other more and more. so the rest of the story i am sure you all know.

    he is married and have 3 kids. we are same age. honestly, i haven’t really felt that bad before in any of my relationship. when i said bad means after all the romance and when you get back to yourself and asked yourself what u r doing and wether its worth it or not. getting involve with a married man is worse than getting into any other single guy beacuse too many people involved. so my ad vise is that don’t even start it. I regret of what i did and it makes me feel so cheap and low self esteem.

    I am now trying to take the rollercoaster mood…it come up and down everyday. I try to calm myself and when the pain comes then i take it and try to tell myself its gonna be ok very soon. then i feel better but when the bad mood comes back then here i am again keep telling myself the same thing. so its hard but only me myself can help the situation and move on. Its so hard that i have to go thru this alone.

    I don’t even want to hate him for what he did cos there is no point. I just hope that i can leave him alone and he can do the same to do….cos i have a better life in front of me even its hard to walk there. but there is no shortcut. so what i do everyday is to online look at articles…cooking and do what make me feel good but i still not in the mood of seeing more people.

    I just deleted all his contacts from phone and sms and email from my list. He is a coward. let me tell you something, men can say whatever they want to say just to make themselves feel good and feel young. they love the attention…at 1st u wont be able to see it so clearly cos u used ur heart to think and not ur head. so when its about time u will start to use ur head to think…and u will know that actually he is not that into you.

    I think i deserve it when the bad mood comes ‘attack’ me. so i will take it sometimes i can’t even cry. sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night, i still remember what happened and the guilt and how stupid i was. but there is something i didnt do which is to let his wife know about it. i even telling him not to join me when im traveling cos this is just no good and not fair for the wife and then i started to think is this fair for the wife that her husband is telling me how much he miss me and how much he loves me and i actually feel good. not fair right? i hate myself for that.

    now after so many mths we dont keep contact i can see things clearly and start to know that whatever emotions bad or guilt or regret or pain i will have to take it and let my heart pains and let me go thru this. I wanted to blame him who make the move 1st and trying hard to be with me but i am the one who let myself fall in the trap so who to blame? can’t blame anyone i can only blame myself so the emotion kicks just take it and slowly hopefully i will be able to have better self esteem.

    I stop doing what i like few mths ago..i will take my time and heal my heart cos i believe eventually i will pull through and everything will be fine for me.

    I know a lot of people we all need attention and love but its not a healthy relationship so better just stop it as soon as you can. the more you cling into it the more you suffer. and don’t ever call the wife or revenge cos u urself also be responsible of what you are doing and the best way is to accept and let go.

    Just don;t forget if you are involve with a married man maybe it takes 3 to 5 yrs for you to wait and finally he tells you that he cant leave the wife and kids while he has to say goodbye(he wont say now and will promise u will take care of u)to you. then u try to look for some guys who used to call you or interested in you but they all got married and not available. A lot of women who stay for the married men ended up like that trust me!!! time is too precious to waste women!!!

    I was too naive but i would like to see him again one day when i have my own family. i don’t hate him..what i can say is…things are complicated and the timing is not right. I don;t miss him that much now cos he let me down which is good also. but there is no need to hate.

    I am moving on and so far so good. my little home with my bf (next year will be husband) is here and we r going to start own home in 4 months. I sometimes will goto furniture store and buy this and that. i think we should appreciate what we have now and be in a healthy relationship…be the one and only one for your man and not the second cos u r gonna regret.

    sweet things are not hard to say from a man’s mouth. but actions speak louder than words.

    delete what he sent you and buy for you. oh it reminds me of throwing away the Valentines card he sent me this year and then that was the last thing from him. also the house i am staying now he came to this house before so i will not stay there after 3 mths. see i am doing what i should be doing.

    i hope you all can get out of this kind of relationship as soon as you can. don;t waste your time. a man who truly love you will not come to you when he is still attached to another woman cos he wont hurt you…he wont like to see you cry or suffer. if he is the man he will show u his love by his actions. if he cant and still want to cling with u that means he is too selfish.

    good luck!

  • At 12:02 am on November 1, 2009, stacey commented:

    i just started sleeping with my boss who is married…i also hav a boyfriedn but is away for 3 years… my problem is i am starting to like my boss more than i wanted to. what do i do? i lov my bf but i am so confussed and my boss doest want anything more. but he must be unhappy if he is sleeping with me right? help someone please

  • At 4:38 pm on November 3, 2009, Nicky commented:

    I too, have a similar story. I fell for a guy, older and higher up in the company, about 8 years ago now. I thought he was totally out of my league and was in a turbulent relationship when I met him , and his then girlfriend was pregnant with their first child. I split from my boyfriend, the guy got married and had 2 more children, still I didn’t share my feelings for him. Eventually I met my husband and got married and out of the blue last year the guy reveals he has feelings for me. It had always been about him and I caved in, feeling guilt but totally addicted to him. It has been going on for just over a year and I know he won’t leave his family, and i don’t expect him to. I am full of confusion, I thought I’d never be in this situation, but I loved this man before I met my husband and my emotions are very mixed. When I’m with him (every day at work) I think of him. When I’m not with him I think of him. It is very easy to berate the men but as I say he has never pretended to me that this is anything it is not, he says he cares for me but it isn’t love. I know i’m on self-destruct and I do love my husband, truly… it is possible to love m ore than one person. I’m sure it will end soon and I will be devastated but what will be will be. Hope some of you ladies have happy endings ;o)

  • At 12:02 pm on November 6, 2009, lostinlove commented:

    I found my “first love” again after 11 years of being apart with no contact whatsoever. He is married and I am in a relationship with my children’s father. According to him, his marriage is a farse. He is only with her because of the children. They have even filed for divorce in the past but never went through with it. My relationship is full of more “lows” than “highs” and I am truly not happy. I can’t afford to leave right now and my SO won’t leave so I am stuck at the moment. My FL and I talked constantly for the first month & a half. We saw eachother a few times and it was wonderful. It was the best sex I’ve ever had and all of my old feelings for him were coming back. Then life started to get in the way. We talk maybe 30 minutes a day now and I haven’t even seen him in over a month. He seems to be in a bad mood more often than not. I’ve told him that if he didn’t want to talk to me- it’s ok- he doesn’t have to try to be nice. He says he wants to talk to me but things are just hectic at home and work- but it will get better. I want to be with him. I want a relationship with him. I want to be the one to cook him dinner, take care of him when he is sick, go out with him. I know none of it is possible. I am back and forth all the time wanting to end it.

  • At 11:44 pm on November 24, 2009, Lucy commented:

    I have not yet slept with this married man, but we are heading towards that way and I am questionning myself..
    we met a few months ago, working together and from the start we got along amazingly great, we have more things in common than anyone I know and make each other laugh.. we can’t get enough of the other,
    Recently, he admitted being very attracted to me and I admitted the same. During a night out, we had a ‘flash’ kiss (alcohol was involved..) and I stopped it there because I did not want to be the cause of family problems. (he is married, with kids).. But it has been a couple months and i cannot think about anything else but him. and same in his situation.. what to do??!

  • At 5:28 am on December 6, 2009, Samantha commented:

    I just started seeing a married man today. He and I have been running into each other for the past four and a half months because of his job and naturally held a business relationship. Last night he and I got a little more personal and today ended up sleeping together. Personally I do not want a long term relationship with him since I have just recently ended a four year relationship with my ex, with whom I lived for three of those years and was just looking for some sort of rebound relationship. In my past relationship I was emotionally and psychologically abused. The last straw was when he tried to physically abuse me. I was left in a very vulnerable state after everything I was forced to endure in that relationship and I’m having a hard time piecing my life back together. The married man I started seeing today has been the subject of my fantasies for the past three weeks because of how much I saw in him that I knew I would love in a man that was exclusively mine. I did not mention this to him and had not intended to since I think my judgment has been clouded by my past relationship but today after sex he confessed that I had caught his eye since the first day he met me. And he also made it very clear that it was not just a physical thing, but that every quality he has seen in me during our chats is something he is very attracted to. He had been married for two months when I met him and I fear that these feelings that he has expressed are the cause of his resolution to get divorced as soon as the monetary debt he shares with his wife is paid, and I would feel guilt for being the cause of this. He also made suggestions as to how good we would be together. I fear that my vulnerability state at the moment because of my past relationship will drive me into this relationship he’s seeking to start and keep with me. I also fear that having slept with him before I knew his feelings was a bad idea because I have in some way shown the same type of attraction towards him. I do admit I had not felt so happy as I did today after being with him but I also don’t want to make a mistake simply because I had a really bad experience in the past and anything at this point would seems heavenly compared to it. I have no idea as to what to do.

  • At 1:05 pm on December 12, 2009, Tabitha commented:

    So sleeping with someone who is taken. Seems to be okay by some and not by others. Honestly who are we to judge others. I was once in a great relationship and I thought we were both in it 100%..then I found out he wasn’t and slowly I was losing him. It’s over now. I could never fully prove that he cheated, but I suspect he did. I fooled myself into believing that what I missed the most about him was that we were best friends and talked about everything. So here I am a few months later being his friend and listening to how great his new girlfriend is. Easy right…no way, how wrong I was. It was fine until we met up and went out to dinner. Do you know what happened? the same old togetherness..right up to the sleeping together. Wow!!! I am the other woman now. I keep quite when he talks to her on the phone. I listen to all his future plans with her. What is wrong with me to hold on to such a loser, because he can cheat so easily with someone he is supposed to care about. I want better in life so I broke all contact. Lets see how long that lasts. I hope there is a great guy out there for me, but honestly how do you make it work when deep down you know that nothing is forever and love sometimes isn’t strong enough to make things last????

  • At 12:16 pm on December 18, 2009, meg commented:

    i was once let myself fall into that kind of shit but now after many months and being apart with that married man, i know why i was falling for him. It was such a waste of time. and i was so naive. NOw it’s over and i am glad that things stop earlier.

  • At 3:33 pm on December 19, 2009, sarahjane commented:

    Its good to know that im not the only one in this situation. Im 23 and for the past month ive been sleeping with a guy who’s 30. He’s been married for a year but has a 3 year old son with his wife. I met him through work but we were never very close until we got talking on a night out and swapped numbers, I never intended for anything to happen with him, but suddenly we went from mates to being a whole lot more! I do know that what I am doing is wrong, and on several occasions I have tried to work up the courage to send him a text and tell him Im finishing it. But I cant. The rush I get from being with him is amazing and he treats me the way any guy should treat a woman.

    I know that he will never leave his wife, that much is clear, and to be quite fair, I dont want him to. I do feel guilty about what im doing as I know he is someone elses man, but in the defence of all women in my situation you really cannot help who you like or even fall in love with. I know it wont last, but for the time being, im happy, Im only in it for the sex, not the relationship, as is he, therefore we are both getting what we want ot of it.

    I know that he is unhappy at home, otherwise he wouldnt come to me, its clear that he really likes me, and if im honest, if he was single, he would be my perfect guy. We like all the same things and have so much in common.

    At the moment it doesnt bother me that he goes home to his wife every night, I know I cant let it bother me as its not my place and we shouldnt be doing it anyway. But he is just as much to blame as I am. I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years in June and it just seems like now im getting some attention I cant walk away.

    I just know that if it continues much longer, I will start to develop feelings and it will bother me that he is still with her. But I know I cant stop, ive tried countless times!!! Aaaaargh Dramas!!!

  • At 11:20 am on January 4, 2010, meg commented:

    sarahjane,

    one day you will come back here and look at what you wrote here and notice how foolish you are.

    I am sure the time will come. take care.

  • At 9:39 am on January 6, 2010, Neo commented:

    i am involved with a colleague, a married man 15 years older than me, who claims to have an amazing sex life with his wife and loves her more than anything in this world. and yet he has been chasing me since we first met in 2008. everyday i ask myself why i can’t stay away.

  • At 12:09 am on January 9, 2010, Atlpure commented:

    Wow it’s amazing that just about everything i pull up on the internet about this topic or know some female who is going through the same thing or have. I got back in touch with a lover of mine from a few years ago. He was married and still is and i have daughter with my boyfriend. Me and boyfriend were going through stuff and my lover who i still had feelings for and he too still had feelings for me decided to go through with it. He claimed he was unhappy and him and his wife relationship wasnt what i thought it was. He told me on the phone the phone one day he thought he was in love with her and yes had been knowing her for years but not the person he thought he knew. He has 2 kids with her so we were seeing each other very heavily for 2years. Then BAM she got pregnant with another child(that’s another story)!! Ever since then he started lieing and oh yeah he kept her pregnacy from me. I had to go on my instincts and found out the truth….the ninth month!!! His lies kept coming ang by then i should have stop seeinghim but couldnt. I was sooo deeply in love with him. My boyfriend wasnt making me feel good like he was. Whether it was sex, or the way he looked at me, or whatever. I was hooked. Long story short i decided since it’s a new year 2010 i dont want to deal with him anymore. With me it’s not that i ever wanted him to leave his wife even though he used to talk like he was and me too-but a family member also confirmed he was going to leave his wife at one point…this was around the time he was with me!!! lol Crazy stuff , my story, but after 3rd child was born he just started to lie soooo much and not coming around or contacting me like he used too. Had an excuse for everything and we all know that wifey was putting down those rules and responsibilities of a husband was knocking @ him lod and clear. Fine…just stop seeing me or break it off with me if you say you care about me so much or love me. Right? Instead of leading me on and trying to keep me in your back pocket! And another thing this married man was cheating on his wife badly before i came back in his life!! Just thought i would throw that out there.

  • At 7:07 pm on January 28, 2010, TheManUHate commented:

    Hello Ladies….I’m the married man you can’t stop sleeping with. All of your posts all seem to say the same thing…”I know he’ll never leave her”. Why is it you are all so smart but yet so dumb at the same time?
    Let’s take a look at what happens…why do you fall for me? Better yet how do I back you into a corner and make your panties fall down so easily. Easily is an understatement.
    First off…yes I am married. Yes I have children. Do I love my wife? Very much so. Would I leave her for you? You already know the answer to that question. But now matter how much I love my wife she gets to be like driving the same car year after year after year. You get bored with the same car. It just doesn’t perform like it used to and in some cases it just quits all together. And here is where the seduction takes over. I see you….I’ve had my mind on you for a while….you just dont know it. Why you? That’s easy! You are a kind loving person. But you also have a big weakness. You are lonely…you are insecure…you need to be loved. It’s written all over you. You are my perfect target! Then I start planting the seeds. A little compliment here and there. Maybe buy you lunch sometime. Tell you how your eyes sparkle when I give you that cupcake with the birthday candle in it. You are so easy. You fall for all my BS so perfectly. Thats why I picked you…remember? Like a fool you never saw any of this coming. It hits you like a bolt out of the blue. And it jolts you so badly that all of your morals go straight out the window. It’s fun…it’s exciting…and the element of danger makes it all that more “romantic” to you. You try to convince yourself that this “isn’t right”. By now you are like the kid with his hand in the cookie jar. You aren’t a slut…you aren’t a whore…those are expensive. Besides…sluts and whores take all the fun out of it for me. The thrill of the hunt wouldn’t be there. What you are is a victim…you just don’t realize it yet. That will come later…after I’ve made “love” to you a half a dozen times. After you lay there and my phone rings. You know who it is…it’s HER. You try to pretend it doesn’t bother you. But it does. It kills you. The fun is starting to wear off. You can’t help but start getting the feeling you are being used. I don’t care. By now you are practically addicted to this little “relationship”. In fact it’s getting to be a pain in the ass to me. All the lies I have to tell to cover my tracks. All the attention you want. All of my time you take. You slowly become a ball and chain to me. You have served your purpose. The fun is over. You say you love me? You tell me how much it hurts. Too bad honey…I never gave a damn in the first place.Time to look for someone else to start playing with. I need a new toy. All because you were too stupid and fell for all the bullshit. Women like you are a dime a dozen…thanks for all the “fun”…..C YA.

  • At 12:24 am on February 1, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    I’m not trying to make up excuses for anyone but sometimes things just happen. Why do you blame all the women? The men are just as much at fault. Whatever the reasons may be no one is forcing these men. Some of these women should try to find out what is going wrong with their marriage and fix it before they judge anyone. I dated a married man for almost three years, why does that make me a bad person and not him? People who get involved in situations like this aren’t alone. There are always reasons. Uncover them before you judge. Even more so if you are the wife.

  • At 7:17 pm on February 7, 2010, Valerie commented:

    I wrote here over a year ago and I can proudly say I cut all ties with the married guy I was sleeping with. It really makes you feel so much better about yourself. You don’t have to sit and constantly worry if he is lying to you and sleeping with someone other than you/and his wife. Because honestly, you don’t know! I think that drove me to the point of insanity and it absolutely killed my self worth. Please don’t put yourself through what I went through. You are definitely worth so much more!

  • At 2:05 pm on February 26, 2010, nieama commented:

    all you women should be ashamed of yourselves… it doesnt matter how yu feel about him the most important thing is where will your soul end up… adultery is a sin and i wouldnt want to burn in hell for any married

  • At 2:07 pm on February 26, 2010, nieama commented:

    valerie thts so good because i knw you will find better and you are better then tht congratulations god bless u

  • At 2:09 am on March 1, 2010, licruth commented:

    okay sleeping with that married guy may be so off the hook huh??? i have a boyfriend im 17 and so inlove with that guy who gives me the chills and knows how to make me smile even when its a real sad moment…… he has a wife though….. i remember he once said to me…. what if we never had our other partners what would have happen…… im seriously inlove with him and i know it is easy for me to leave my boyfriend for him but i also can say who says he is goin to leave his wife whom he proposed to and formed a family with jus for me….. huh?????? htats ridicule thats why sooner or later i think i should get my self out this hot mess that i never expected to be in…… i feel degraded, i feel like a bitch or prostitue although im not a high percentage of the times they are the one who go with the married mens ….. i need out of this!!! how???? good question!!! but i need out

  • At 3:06 pm on March 1, 2010, help them commented:

    okay….. some help is needed on here

  • At 2:45 pm on March 2, 2010, redmond, wa commented:

    Okay so here’s my deal…I’m 29 sleeping with a married man who’s he’s 11 years my senior. This has been going on for 2 years now, and we have had some pretty intenses times. We meet and do our thing, he’s everything I’d want in a man…tall, smart, handsome with an infectious personality. Not to mention his kisses are simply amazing, I melt in his embrace. I enjoy every minute with him, but like most have mentioned kick myself when he’s not around as I realize I’m alone-all alone. I had thought of emailing his wife but I decided againist. I have nothing againist her, I don’t even know herl; but it wouldn’t be fair to their children (two boys). Now the thing that really complicates this situation is that I’m a guy, yes I’m gay and he says he’s bi and according to him has been involved with men since his college days. This really needs to end…

  • At 8:26 pm on March 2, 2010, Hurt before commented:

    It does need to end (Redmond, Wa). You’ll never have all of him. He can’t admit he’s gay, and with kids in the picture coming to terms with that is even harder. You have to let go so you can leave yourself open to having a full-time, real partner, if that’s what you really want. Truth is, many of us are compelled by unavailable people; it means the pursuit and excitement never end. But longing for love rather than really having it is a fool’s game. You’re no fool, are you?

  • At 2:35 pm on March 6, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    My husband of 15 years just confessed to me that he has cheated on me on and off during the past 5 years with 6 different people. These were most one night stand things and the last one was a fuck buddy. My husband had been emotionally distant from me for quite a while but sex had always been good with us. I always enjoyed sex with him. My world has really been destroyed with this. Any person who sleeps with someone who is married is really DOING EVIL. My husband is no victim of women here, he is 100 percent guilty of cheating on my and did so of his own accord. But the accomplice is ALSO just as guilty of doing evil, of contributing to the destruction of families. You women on this post who are f ing married guys are cowards, you have no courage, you are letting yourselves get used and your actions will come back to haunt you later. You should think about the innocent women and children that you are really hurting. Shame on all of you! Shame on you. Take a good look in the mirror and BE HONEST WITH WHAT YOU ARE REALLY DOING if you have the courage to.

  • At 4:49 pm on March 14, 2010, Melissa commented:

    I cant believe no one responded to the Married Guy who posted!! LOL!!!

    So Mr. Married Guy, I sense your bullshit, Ive heard all the lines before…. Its just sexual temptation… Its as simple as complicated…

    Im being pursued by a married man. Yeah the attention is nice, but Im not stupid… Its just for a f*&k… Id rather use my B.O.B

  • At 4:28 pm on April 3, 2010, anonymous commented:

    I am a married woman ,Ive been marriedfor 24yrs now.Ive met this guy he is married 4months ago atarted an affair we are working together but all of this is a secret relationship.I wrote some love sms to him and his wife caught them.He told me to put everything on hold not to call or sms him we will talk not to discuss anything at work as people will be suspicious of our little meetings.two days later he sent sms telling me things are getting better at home.We are seeing each other on a working environment,but i am very frustrated not sure how to react. i cannt stop thinking about him,is he still gonna see me or I must consider its over?I love him very much,im really suffering not coping wuith the break.this hapenned about 2weeks ago.

  • At 11:39 pm on April 13, 2010, i have a wasband commented:

    Thanks for all this. I am recently (kinda) divorced and have been having my fun. I slept with a married man while I was in a rebound situation, but this was before I was married. Since the split, I told myself that there was no way I would ever do anything with someone that was married. Well, that has all changed. As much as I know it isn’t the right thing to do, I know how crappy my marriage was at the end. I also know that people stay together to look good for the kids. As we have both said, it takes two. Neither of us are innocent, but I am not the one stepping out on my spouse. At the same time, I can’t fault him for it either. It is not ideal, but life is short and as someone said, you just don’t know if that person is the one. If the feelings are so strong that you would cheat (that doesn’t go for all guys, as some are just crazy cheaters) and your marriage isn’t the best… Good luck to us all.

  • At 2:53 am on April 15, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    i regret because i dont know how to express myself.i like yhis girl too deeply and only god know how much i want her.
    i try to speak with her and when the it came,my tounge become numb .
    so right now,i really sober……………….

  • At 1:00 pm on May 28, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    Im sleeping with a married man. He’s 41, extremely gorgeous, with a cute face and body to die for. We just call each other when we need our fix. We not romantically involved; we just hook up to have sex and then get on with our lives after. I know this is wrong and Im careful not to put my heart out there. Im coping with a difficult breakup that shook me to my very core, and having sex with this man sort of takes my mind out of my ex, at least for a couple of hours. We’ve done it 4 times in the last 4 or 5 weeks and I can’t wait to do it again with him the next time”

  • At 8:00 pm on May 30, 2010, Di commented:

    I’ve been sleeping with a married man for almost a month now. I ended it today.
    He told me he separated from his wife because she cheated on him and he overheard then having sex and saying “my husband could never reach this far” She eventually moved out, he says.
    He also told me that she still comes back from time to time since she has stuff there. And he is timing things, bcus when he first brought up the divorce talk, she told him that she is taking half of the apartments that he owns.

    She recently started calling my phone threatening me and he hasnt been doing a good job of explaining. Next week is his birthday, he wanted us to go down the islands for a few nights. I told him no, he’s all upset. I even suggested we go out for dinner on his birthday and he says his mom and brother have plans for him. (his brother does not even talk to him) I asked him what plans and he said that was his business. I hung up, switched off my phone and that was it.

    I feel used and upset because i left my boyfriend for him.

  • At 11:50 am on June 7, 2010, Trixie commented:

    This message goes for eberyone involved with a married msn, and also for the wives of those married men.
    I have been seeing a married man for 3 months but I have known him for 7 yrs. He was my boss, he left the job I am currently in because he wanted to see if leaving this job was going to make things better with his wife. Turns out that it didnt, and we always had a connection,b ut we never acted on it because he was married. Since he left my job a little over a yr ago, we exchanged text almost every day. Until one day this past March, my apt got flooded, and he came to help me, one things led to another and we made love to each other like we have never done it to anyone before. it was amazing! His wife has not been intimate with him in a long time. When he wants to be intimate with her, she tells him to hurry up, or that she is not in the mood. He has told her that he is not happy with the situation that they are at, and he asked her if she wanted to get divorce, and she said no, that it seems he is the only one not happy with the situation. As a married man he owes her sexual fidelity, but what alot of people fail to understand is that sex is very important for a couple’s intimacy. if things are not good, intimacy fades. And another thing is that people only think that sexual fidelity only means not having sex with someone lese, but it also means that she needs to give him sex, and be faithful to his needs as a man. For all you christian folks out there, refer yourselves to 1 corithians 7. it talks about our sexual obligation to our spouse. If a man breaks the covenant of marriage by committing adultery, we have to look if the wife has broken the covenant of marriage by refusing him sex, which its part of her duties as a wife. Unless she is sick or the children are in need, she should submit to her husband the same way he should submit to his wife. It is clear in the bible that a spouse should give him sex often to prevent sexual inmorality. We love to blame the man and the woman the man is having the affair with but we seem to forget to give responsability to the wife for the husnabd’s actions. We are the reflection of our spouse.

  • At 5:08 pm on June 23, 2010, The Sexy Adultress commented:

    I know I’m wrong, but I’m sleeping with a married man. I knew he was married and I said no at first, but he finally pulled me in. He’s 15 years older, and honestly the best sex I’ve ever had. We have been messing around for almost a year. I’ve tried to cut it off, but every time I fail. I’m a an aldulter and a hypocrite. Just because this feels good to us, we all know it’s not right. If I was married I wouldn’t want my husband cheating on me. I don’t want this in my life, but I guess I’m not strong enough to get out of it. As the say, the devil’s got a hold on me.

  • At 5:16 pm on June 27, 2010, to do him, or not to do him commented:

    Okay- I need advice. I’m 22 and he is 34. I haven’t physically been with him yet. Yes, he is married, and yes, its true I don’t care to have a relationship with him. I just want the sex. I met him at work, he is a customer. We were very flirtatous for a few months, and he would even come in with his wife sometimes. But I litterally can’t explain how amazingly attractive he is. He puts brad pitt to shame… Even my coworkers would stumble over themselves to see him when he was in the store. One day he gave me his number. I didn’t plan to call- he was way out of my league. (Or so I thought). - and not to mention the “married” part. He ended up calling the store a few days later to tell me to call him. I did. Since then, we’ve talked and texted every day. (Mostly sexting and phone sex, but not always) This has been over a month ago. And I can now def understand why girls become “the other woman”. Its so exciting to do something you know you aren’t sopposed to do and this raw lusting feeling is so hot I can barely contain myself when I see him. I’m honestly still unsure if I should sleep with him bc like everyone else is saying “I’m not this homewrecking slut”. But its headed that way. He’s been asking “when” a lot and I’m running out of excuses/chances to be with him. I know that this sounds so bad… But I don’t want to look back at this in 10 years and say “you could of had THAT, but you were too scared.” And I’m ashamed that I don’t feel more guilty, that I’m honestly looking forward to it. I know he just wants the sex…but that’s all I want out of it too. So here I am, looking for advice. Please don’t just say “don’t do it”. I figure if I could get honest opions from people who have been in my shoes, this would be the place.

  • At 5:20 pm on June 27, 2010, to do him, or not to do him commented:

    Okay- I need advice. I’m 22 and he is 34. I haven’t physically been with him yet. Yes, he is married, and yes, its true I don’t care to have a relationship with him. I just want the sex. I met him at work, he is a customer. We were very flirtatous for a few months, and he would even come in with his wife sometimes. But I litterally can’t explain how amazingly attractive he is. He puts brad pitt to shame… Even my coworkers would stumble over themselves to see him when he was in the store. One day he gave me his number. I didn’t plan to call- he was way out of my league. (Or so I thought). - and not to mention the “married” part. He ended up calling the store a few days later to tell me to call him. I did. Since then, we’ve talked and texted every day. (Mostly sexting and phone sex, but not always) This has been over a month ago. And I can now def understand why girls become “the other woman”. Its so exciting to do something you know you aren’t sopposed to do and this raw lusting feeling is so hot I can barely contain myself when I see him. I’m honestly still unsure if I should sleep with him bc like everyone else is saying “I’m not this homewrecking slut”. But its headed that way. He’s been asking “when” a lot and I’m running out of excuses/chances to be with him. I know that this sounds so bad… But I don’t want to look back at this in 10 years and say “you could of had THAT, but you were too scared.” And I’m ashamed that I don’t feel more guilty, that I’m honestly looking forward to it. I know he just wants the sex…but that’s all I want out of it too. So here I am, looking for advice. Please don’t just say “don’t do it”. I figure if I could get honest opinions from people who have been in my shoes, this would be the place.

  • At 6:19 pm on June 27, 2010, tonette commented:

    Hi!Im also sleeping with a married man,i never thought that this will happen to me,i was so picky after i broke up with my long term boyfriend,ii’ve been single for almost 2yrs.but one day when my friend introduce me to this married man,my eyes sparkle,its like love at first sight call it crazy but its true.that nigth we started talking and he gets my number,but we are both transparent to each other i saw his wife,so i never expect that he will contact me again..the following day he called me and that s our relationship started im inlove wiht this man and he did told me that his inlove with me..he always said that he never thought it will happen to fall for me..we’ve been together now for 7months and our relationship gets stronger and stronger.i know this not right but what can i do i fall for this married man..i try to control my feeling but i rather be with him even for a short time than hurting myself forever.coz i know myself when i fall inlove i can’t easily get out from it…..i know im a stupid girl but what can i do im just woman falling in love…

  • At 1:37 pm on July 10, 2010, anonymous commented:

    “to do him or not to do him”… I hope you chose not to. You know it’s wrong. It’s hard to say no, but SO much harder once you’ve already done it.

    I continue to sleep with a married man. It’s sporadic– we live in different states and only ever see each other when I visit (my family is there). But I haven’t been back without seeing him in a year. We always end up in bed. It is incredibly fun.. until I wake up days later with a pit in my stomach thinking about how cheap the whole ordeal really is, about how much more I am worth than this. I guess I don’t really believe that, or maybe I’d knock it off?

    I know it’s wrong, I know it’s damaging, I know that eventually I will probably start to care about him(I’m a chick, after all), and it will only hurt me in the end. I keep trying to make myself CARE about doing what’s right.. I just don’t.

    Pray for me.

  • At 12:27 am on July 15, 2010, halo1braveheart commented:

    I am really surprised to hear how many women are in the same situation. My take is this: Chemistry will always be the beginning of the affair. Own it and learn from it. Exploring a relationship with a married man is like taking a bridge to nowhere. Do not waste precious years of your life at the wrong event. There are SO many possibilities that this world can offer. So many opportunities for you to get what you want. I’ve been there. I can relate but for me, walking away leaves him in his situation and all of a sudden I am free. I can ride the waves of life without an anchor. A MARRIED MAN is an anchor whether he is your married man or the one you are sleeping with. Your beauty is like a flower and can regenerate season after season. Let your fantasy die and wash away. Grow and be better for experiencing it but for don’t LIE to yourself. DO NOT LIE to your own HEART. DO NOT confuse lust, touch, lips, rocking hips, tickled, tumble, pinch and tighter, see ya later, hi there baby for a romance. Its a tryst. tryst. tryst. A playful game. Your pain is your death. Choose life.

  • At 10:19 pm on July 21, 2010, kavita commented:

    all girl and women out there please rememmber this do not sleep with married man !donot listen to what the man said about his wife! as a married couple we had our up and down in married life! If this man happen to be your friend please advice them and give him a moral support ,be a good listener to him , most all this guy you met are elderly they have children that why they are so loving and passonate do not get carried away with his good quality but you should thank god to met you with so good hearted man and you should treasure the relationship ,you should not fall for him especially when he confess he got wife and children , please study the situation my be he is far away from his wife and family and you as his friend donot encourage , or take advantage on his lonelines situation . he needed you as a friend please respect his feling not to make the situation worse by creating another situation by having sex with him, It is very painfull and devastating situation when the wife dicovered her belove husband unfaitfull to them ! girls put yourself in his wife situation then only you will know how it will hurt and crushed your heart!.It is very nice to say im sleeping with a married man but think what you have done wisely !it is a beginning of nitemare in your life ! Please say no to married man ! to save both relationship and to have a trusted best friend !!! my advice is go for single man no string attached ,! they are plantifull out there and you find it life more more mening full and exiting and very safe too!

  • At 8:03 pm on August 4, 2010, christy commented:

    So quick question.. If you were dating someone that you didn’t really love but also didn’t want to hurt, while sleeping with someone who was also taken but didn’t love the one they’re with, what would you do?

  • At 9:23 am on August 12, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    I am a 33 year old female. and carrying physical relations with a married woman. Is it a healthy relationship?

  • At 1:08 am on August 13, 2010, Crazy in Michigan commented:

    So, you type “I’m sleeping with a Married man” into google, and this is where it takes you. And here we all are…. all of us women whom someone fallen into the lust of a married man. Well, I haven’t done it YET,but here’s my story.

    I met a man only a few days ago, he is sexy..sexy! Smart, and an actor like myself. We have so much in common. I payed him a compliment, than realized that he is married. So I apologized and said, “I didn’t realize you were married”

    He failed to acknowledge it, and now after non stop talking, texting, sending photos back and forth on our cells. He is driving 3 hours to stay the night with me in 3 days. I’m nervous, excited…scared…. hopeful, well you name it… I’m that. He is a lot older, and has 3 children and has been married for 14 years.

    Sigh, I know I’m setting myself up for hell…. .really…

    What the hell, why is lust so damn powerful.

  • At 2:04 am on August 13, 2010, Confused&Addicted commented:

    So WHAT IF HE IS NOT HAPPY AND IS GOING TO LEAVE HIS WIFE??? I am falling for a married man, he is falling for me..well we have already fallen..its been 3 months that we have had our little fling, im 21, he is 25, he’s been married for 5 years…they were young when they got married and they just dont have anything in common now that they are grown adults, they dont even talk, his wife also thinks they will get a divorce but he is very serious…his friends also encourage him to divorce because everyone kind of knows how unhappy he is…we have agreed to stop talking so he can “try” to work things out with his wife basically out of respect for the vows, not because he actually thinks they will be able to work anything out…he is everything i want in a man, he is very honest and true despite his cheating with me…im just wondering what i do now?? we are really into eachother, he tells me he thinks im his soulmate, we could definitley and have talked about how beautiful and exciting a relationship we could have together someday….i have always been a very moral and smart women but its hard to ignore these very real feelings..im just addicted to him..i really just love being around him…he is everything i have ever wanted/needed…do you all think it is true that if he cheated on her he would cheat on me? he says he wouldnt. I have discussed my concerns with him, i have told him if he leaves his wife it better not be for me it better be because he is just no longer in love with her..we havent slept together because neither of us think it is a good idea..ugh…WHAT DO I DO??

  • At 9:33 am on August 17, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    DON’T DO IT! They never leave. They lie, they sleep with other women. Maybe one in a million will actually love you back, but its not worth it to take the chance. DON’T DO IT. Its so hard to break away once you are in.

  • At 10:47 pm on August 23, 2010, halo1braveheart commented:

    A recent study was done and it was discovered that the first thing men notice about woman is their eyes, and the first thing that woman notice about men is that they are all liars…

  • At 6:49 pm on August 30, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    It’s not a good idea. It starts as fun and you never expect it to go anywhere and you didn’t mean for it to happen. It’s a roller coaster…yes, the highs are great, but the lows are miserable. Often, you question if he is telling you the truth, I mean he IS lying to his wife to be with you. Plus, imagine having to be around him often, not as his lover, but just a person because nobody else knows. Even if he feels the same way, he is still married and not in the process of leaving…not because they want to stay, it is just easier. Why go through the drama when they can have a good relationship on the side? (sex that is)

    I may sound bitter, but am not. I am stuck, possibly in love, want to end, but can’t imagine not having him around. Yet, I spend my nights sleeping alone and the time we have is in short spurts…usually only an hour, three if I am super lucky.

    I just want to save one person from the heartache.

  • At 11:12 am on September 19, 2010, anti-love commented:

    I have been with a married cop for like 4 months now. Its amazing. The best fantasy come true baby!! But i am starting to fall for him, he is 43 and i am 22. ha. he is amazing, BUT.. reading all these posts makes me never want to get married. All men cheat and are dogs. haha. im just bagging me a hot DILF while i can. ha. screw this world and society. never get married. never trust anyone.

  • At 7:13 am on September 25, 2010, kenz commented:

    I’m doing the same thing.. he is 28 and I’m 18. He’s been married two years. The only difference is, I know it is only a sexual relationship so it doesn’t bother me that he goes home to somebody else. I don’t expect him to leave his wife and I’m not even sure why he’s cheating on her with me. But I have to agree it’s very exciting and dangerous.. just what I like. Is it wrong that I’m not sure if I care that I’m putting their marriage at stake..?

  • At 5:36 pm on October 3, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    I am also in a slight relationship with my boss we are sleeping together yet but there is alot of heavy petting and bumping into each other. what is really hard is he is friends with my husband and i his wife. talk about keeping it under the table. I love my husband but I like the excitement of it. we are both getting older (50’s) and like the whole feeling young thing. I know it is wrong but i also don’t want to stop. i asked a friend here in and they said quote “the only way to avoid temptation is to give into it” once you taste it will loose its appeal.

  • At 7:44 pm on October 18, 2010, wae commented:

    Wow. This is probably terrible for me to say but I feel some sort of relief reading alll of these posts from so many women in similar situations. I met this guy about a month ago…I am 23 and single and he is 27 and married. We met at a bar and literally just locked eyes across the room and things just went from there. He told me about 1 hour into meeting him he was married… I NEVER in a million years imagined myself in this situation- but even after he told me, I felt this intense chemistry I could not resist. I’m not sure I’ve ever been as sexually attracted to anyone else as I am to him… He says he is happy and loves his wife and I am completely aware it is just about sex (which could not be better for me, came out of a relationship recently and am moving in 6 months across the country). My question is: if he’s so happy in his marriage why are he and I having incredible passionate rendezvous together where neither of us can keep ourselves off the other one? I know he feels guilty but he keeps contacting me even when Ive tried to distance myself… This whole relationship is turning my view of society and marriage upside down…. At first I felt guilty but now I’ve come to love the terms of our relationship. He gives me exactly what I need in my currently-not-looking for commitment, loving my freedom, career, and yoga six days a week lifestyle. This whole thing still feels surreal…

  • At 9:50 am on October 26, 2010, fay64 commented:

    I’ve been sleeping with a married man 13 years my senior. We’ve been together over a year. He’s my doctor and I’m a nurse. I’ve known and admired and respected him for over 20 years. He knew my marriage was shaky and after I finally gathered the courage to file and leave my husband he swept in. He had never been suggestive or inappropriate in all the years I knew him. He was just kind and understanding on the few occasions when I’d go in to see him as his patient. He is SO attractive and has the most gorgeous eyes and sexiest voice. His kids are all grown and he *says* his wife is not interested in sex and has emotional issues. I know he’ll never leave her. I guess I fall more into the “mistress” category as he lavishes me with money and gifts; he’s very wealthy. The sex? AMAZING, best I ever had in my life. We talk and text everyday. He’s taken me out of town on some marvelous trips. Do I love him? You bet. Will this be forever? it can’t be. I don’t want to be alone forever and I will be if I stay with him. It’s comforting to read the stories of so many other women in the same position. I never dreamt I’d do something like this. I never so much as kissed another man while I was living with my husband of 23 years.

  • At 11:23 am on October 26, 2010, fay64 commented:

    I’d just like to add, for reasons undefined I do not feel guilty. SHE gets all of him, I get the BEST of him. I do not know his wife, I’ve only met her once in the last fifteen years or so. I do feel like I’m hurting her, he is. Were it not me, it would be another woman. Yes, I was not his FIRST affair. Their children are very much grown and on their own. If anything? I’ve likely made him easier to live with as he’s sexually sate now.

  • At 11:28 am on October 26, 2010, fay64 commented:

    I meant to say “I DO NOT feel like I’m hurting her, he is”

  • At 2:08 pm on October 28, 2010, Not Stupid commented:

    I’m sleeping with a married man i’ll call him FD those are his intials. we like each other i know dam well he’s not gonna leave his wife & i don’t want him to . it’s all in the fun i know i’m last on his list & that’s fine. Why is it that when i don’t chase him & don’t give him the time of day he gets nuts & thinks i’m sleeping with someone else i’m not sleeping with anyone else yet. i’m just goin on dates with other guys. i’ve gotta to know him pretty well & man i would not wana be married to this jerk not because he’s cheating but he is a total ass. I sent his wife a letter saying exactly what her dumb ass married i fell sorry for her.

  • At 8:10 pm on November 11, 2010, islandgal commented:

    ok….i.can.finally.get.this.off.my..chest..

    iam.25.and.iam.sleeping.with.boss.who.is.almost.40.and.married…i.have.worked.with.him.for.less.than.a.year.and.he,resigned.recently..nothing.had.happened.until.he,resigned..until..a.few.weeks.ago.after.he.resigned.

    a.handful.of.workmates.went.out.and.he.was.there.as.well.we.kept.flirting.the.whole.night.and.somehow.ended.up.at.my.place.and.god.we.had.incredible.sex.
    he.is.leaving.the.country.tomorrow.morning.going.back.home.and..know.we.weill.be.fucking.again.tonight.one.last.time
    i.truley,cant,resist.him..never..saw..me.doing.something.like.this.but.trust.me.it.can.happen.to.anyone…SO..ALL..U.PEOPLE..OUT..THERE..DONT..JUDGE..
    just..cuz..u..are.not..fucking..a.married..man..doesnt..mean.u..are.a.angel..im..sure..u.also..have..skeletons..in..the..closet…
    wish..me..luck..for..tonight..and..tomorrow..its..back..to.reality..for..me

  • At 5:53 pm on November 26, 2010, having what i can't have commented:

    I’m sleeping with a married man for about 9 months now. When i met him he told me he was married i had no intention of sleeping with him or anything like that i had just gotten out of a relationship and was not ready for another especially since he had a family. We started talking and going out a month into it he won me over and i slept with him the sex was mind blowing. We never talk about his family and i never ask, when am with him it is just us we have fun laugh alot. But now thing are compicated because i have gotten back together with my ex but still sleeping with the married man. My ex do not no about him and he does not no am back with my ex the married guy do not live here he travel back and forth to orlando to be with his wife and kids. I have try to end it a thousand time before i will stop texts him for a while i won’t call him at all but as soon as he gets into town and he calls me i go weak my brain go to soup and all i want to see him and do what we do best is sex he does thing to my body that no other man has done i am a adictited to his sex. I no it is not love that we shear i would never ask him to leave his wife for me. I want to stop but do not no how to he is like a drug that i cannot get off of. He is away spending time with his family for thanksgiving in orlando and we slept together the night before he left now all i thing about is the sex we had even when am laying next to my boyfreind at night. I miss him even thou we never said I LOVE YOU to each other i cannot wait until he is back. I am trying not to text him or call him until he gets back to the Islands i will let him have his time with his family. I is sad i no i have talk to freinds and even my priest to try and get him out of my mind but no lucky so far.

  • At 3:27 am on December 5, 2010, jenn commented:

    wow im 25 sleeping with a man who is 37.. and just got married for the 3rd time. he really opened up to me the other night telling me that he has only gotten married so that he wouldnt be alone.. till he met me and i was the one! i have no idea what to do…

  • At 11:14 am on December 10, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    I’ve slept with a married man twice. I feel horrible. I feel like such a whore. I feel like such a bad person.

  • At 4:04 pm on December 31, 2010, Anonymous commented:

    I just got out of a relationship with a married man and it has been extremely difficult. It’s in way way, shape or form easy to end a relationship that neither person wants to end. However, like the individual stated above, I am the free one now and the world is full of so many other possibilities that I have yet to explore.

    My story is so similar to all of the stories here. I know that without a doubt he was in love with me but he wanted to have both. I couldn’t do that. While the ups of the relationship were amazing, we laughed so much together, the sex was great and we could spend hours talking and just being around each other, the lows were awful. I could never fully trust anything he told me (including that he was separated which was later proved otherwise). I ended it and I know that with time I will be much better off.

    There is a lot of great advice here and it all comes down to this: it’s not worth the heartache in the end. It’s best to avoid or get out of the affair as soon as possible. I know that’s much easier said than done. Believe me I know, it can feel like torture. But the sooner the better so you can move on with your life.

  • At 3:57 pm on February 2, 2011, Attracted2theTaken commented:

    It’s been over 2 years since I last posted on this blog. (April 16, 2008). Since my last post, I have (wisely) ended my “relationship” with the married man. Things got real deep, real fast. I started falling for him hard and it hit me one day that I WILL NEVER TRULY HAVE HIM. Honestly, I wasn’t sure I really DID want him. But once the excitement of what we were doing wore off, and the feelings started to sink in, it scared me. So I ended it.

    Sounds strange, but today, we are good friends. He has since ended his marriage and is dating. I, too, am dating a really nice guy. And the best part of that is HE IS AVAILABLE to me. I can actually go out in public with him, hold hands and kiss him knowing that he is mine.

    I feel horrible for what I did and have repented. I’ve forgiven myself as God has too. I will say this…It feels good being in a honest, open realationship with a really great person. I can sleep at night knowing I’m not causing some woman somewhere, pain.

  • At 5:52 pm on February 6, 2011, angry wife commented:

    im sleepin with a married man but he is my husband just wanted to tell those if u who sleep w married men and u no they r should think twice cuz how would u like that happening to you my husband cheated on me i found out confrounted the them both course they denied it but i found out everything i needed to no it ended but it hurt our family bad and she haD FOUND OUT HE WAS MARRIED WHEN I FOUND HER NUMBER I CALLED he she denied everything till i fdound where she lived and busted him there so 4 those who no their datin a married man please think twice cus ur hurtin ur self along w a family weather its a happy one or not and if ur not sure their married theres ways to find out and if u didnt no when u started datin them but found out later please end it cuz in the end if hes datein u and cheatin on his wife he will cheat on u garenteed sooner or later but 4 us wives that r true and faithful to their husbands through all even after we find out the hurt is always there so PLEASE THINK TWICE B4 DATIN A MARRIED MAN THERE COULD B CHILDREN INVOLVED :(

  • At 11:09 pm on February 24, 2011, AlotToLearn commented:

    i just turned 21 and i am too sleeping with a married man. he is 28 and has a wife and 2 kids. it makes me sick everytime i deeply think about it. like the rest of you guys, i didnt think i would be in this situation either. im in love with him but i know its wrong. at first he told me he was seperated but come to find out he is still very married to his wife. i havent talked to him in about amonth because im trying to get away from this but everyday i find myself thinking about him, i truely think i love him. i even changed my number but thinking about giving it to him because i miss him. ahhhh this is just too much!!!

  • At 1:05 am on March 16, 2011, Sebring, FL commented:

    Are you ready for this juicy messed up post? I haven’t slept with a married man but I want to. This married man was in love with me in college 23 years ago. I was in love with him but I had issues steming from my childhood. I didn’t want to “be touched” at the time but I deeply loved him. He told me he loved me. My parents pulled me out of college and actually came up and got me. I never returned. We both were pianists back then. I still play. I find him 23 years later and he lives 3 hours away from me only. I’m divorced and he’s unhappily married. He told me he stays because he and his wife adopted a guatamalen girl because his wife couldn’t have children (which coincendently she is for population control anyway, makes me wonder). He says he avoids divorce because his little girl is everything to him. He works for the Catholic church and his wife is against the catholic church because they won’t ordain women among other things. He told me he takes his daughter to church but has to find someone to watch her since he plays the organ. He says he and his wife make a good “team” because they like the same food\tv shows. So did me and my ex but that does not make a marriage. He’s hoping she will “come around”. He said he still has some love in his heart for me. I actually feel more pain in my heart over him than I did during my divorce from my ex. I regret not dating him back then. I always loved him and still do. I felt he was my soul mate. One thing she’s a dentist and makes most of the money. Their house is paid off. I don’t see him leaving her because he enjoys the lifestyle he’s living with her income. I pray each day for God’s will to be done. I know God hates divorce. I’ve read 1 Corinth about if the wife is a nonbeliever he should stay with her since she’s willing to live with him. I’ve been asking God to give me peace and help me get over him or let his will be done. Its one thing if he didn’t work for the church but he works for the church. He is also not allowed to talk about his day to her when he comes home he told me. I wonder why she stays in the marriage. She is so unfair to him. That is so messed up. His daughter was attending preschool in his church, he could check up on her and spend time with her. Now the wife made him take the daughter out of the Catholic Church and is attending a local K school. As I see it, slowly the wife will impose her views on the daughter. The only way the marriage can last is if he slowly continues to give in to her and gives up what he believes. I wouldn’t doubt that eventually she’ll ask him to quit his job. I am Catholic and can still have children and would support him. We used to chat late at night in email but I didn’t want to listen to him vent about his wife anymore. Funny thing is, I have 3 other married men wanting to sleep with me and I do not want nor will I sleep with them yet the one I want to sleep with (my old friend) won’t sleep with me. I was a wife before so I know. Good that he won’t sleep with me right? We all want what we can’t have and the person that molested me changed my damn path in life. If I wouldnt have been afraid to be touched back then, I would have went out with him. I know we would have been together. Poor starving musicians, we would have been at least I would have supported his religion. Yes I’ve been in therapy. I told you its messed up. Sucks.

  • At 2:31 am on March 28, 2011, Lonely in a foreign country commented:

    Wow… I have recently started seeing a married man.. At first we were just friends that met fo coffee and chatted it felt good cause I was in a foreign country without many friends and he was just so kind. Anyway we started texting and emailing and suddenly his messages took on a sexual nature,and to my surprise I responded and finally we met at a hotel and had sex literally all day long. I have promised myself that I would not fall in love with him but I know it is inevitable. He never ever mentions his wife and we have never talked about the state of his maraige wether he is unhappy or not. All I know is we have a explosive attraction and for now this is all it is… He even talks about taking me away on holidays and we spend time together at least twice a week. I know it will never be more than this cause he is 18 years older than me and I know we will lose the spark if he leaves his wife and we have a relationship. For now this works for me and thats it.

  • At 9:22 pm on April 15, 2011, Jennifer commented:

    I met up with a married man back in December 2010. Two days later, his wife found out through checking his email, and kicked him out of the house. She would harrass me for months until I finally broke down and changed my number. I’ve never spoken to her, but I’ve listened to voicemails. She was so angry, hurt, bitter. I understood that. Anyway, paul and I have been seeing each other ever since. He moved back in with his parents. He and his wife have an 18 month old daughter. So the wife will always be in the picture. I have tried to break it off with him. He’s confessed to sleeping with her eventhough they are seperated. Why on earth would I ever have a right to be upset at the fact a husband and wife are having sex? I have no right, but it did hurt in my heart. He could be a sex addict. I dont know. I do know he’s an alcoholic. Every time he comes over, he brings the Cuervo and limes; plus he admits it. He is in the process of getting a divorce. I would want a committment and no cheating from a potential mate, and this guy I could never trust to do so. I want to let him go… and be free.

  • At 6:56 pm on May 21, 2011, Lover2011 commented:

    Here is a different way of looking at this. A woman going through a nasty divorce ,living in intense emotional pain and loneliness, comes across this smart,loving,caring man who happen to be married, He supports her …she can bear the miserable life of nasty legal battle her abusive husband is putting her through. The married man feels her pain..hugs her,kisses her, consoles her and makes her feel happy..bring her trust back in good ness of men..they have sex..they hide it. He loves his wife and children..she starts to love his family..in fact becomes like an invisible member of his family..she doesnot want to destroy his family..she is grateful for love he is sharing with her. Everyone is happy and able to tolerate the burdens of difficult life. Whats wrong with that? you brianwashed,judgemental,slaves of social rules! HUMANITY and
    LOVE is all that matters…all rules are useless if there is love and compassion in a relationship. Stop your stupid guilt trips!!

  • At 4:09 pm on May 25, 2011, hopeless and lost commented:

    When I found this site, I suddenly had this strong desire to share my story.

    I too, had an affair with a married man. I was 26 at the time, and he was 14 years older than me. The affair lasted for about two years, and yes…the wife did find out. Unfortunately, the man I was “involved” with has a history of cheating on his wife over the course of two decades, so it wasn’t that hard for her to figure out what he was up to.

    She quickly learned who I was, and since then, had her claws deep in my back and has yet to let me go even though I ended the affair last year. She found me on Facebook and would track down what I did every day. She figured out who my friends were and got in contact with them via cellphone/texting. She learned who my boss was and constantly was in contact with him. She figured out my phone number from her husband’s phone bill and would text me. She learned my work number and had called me screaming at me on the phone saying “I hope when you get married, this happens to you!” She would drive around my job and follow me when I was outside running errands. She would park outside the gym and see if I would go to the gym with her husband. She would come to work and talk with my co-workers and supervisors, indulging all information about the affair to anyone who would listen. And even though I ended the affair, she still hasn’t stopped. She found my car/apartment keys and torched them, making sure to post what she did on facebook. She had used her child’s email to email me to confirm my other emails. I had changed my phone number and she still managed to get a hold of my new number from my co-workers. She comes to the job on purpose to work out at our gym and eats at our coffee shop, making sure that she is well seen by everyone.

    Having this “relationship” was the worse thing I could ever do not only to myself, but to his wife (despite her stalking me) and to their teenage daughter. I know what I did was wrong. Deep down inside,I honestly wasn’t happy with what was going on. Because the truth was despite the words he shared with me about how he was going to leave her for me, that I was the best he’s ever had, that I was so beautiful, that I had a wonderful sense of humor and that he loved my personality—despite his kind words and his kind actions—they were all *lies*. He would NEVER leave his wife. He would NEVER leave his daughter. He would NEVER tear apart his home for me.

    I don’t know if it was from grief and depression, or fear from his wife who relentless stalked me and kept finding ways to get in contact with me, I finally got mental help. Yes! I went to a therapist. I joined a bible study group. I even go to church. I’ve changed the group of people I hang out with and have a new set of friends. I try to keep my distance from the married guy and I try to move on with someone I don’t have to sneak around with.

    And yes, I still feel guilty, low and disgusted with what I have done. But I am also filled with rage and anger against his wife–not because she is still married to him—but because she won’t leave me alone. If she doesn’t want my apology, then she doesn’t need to be around me. If she doesn’t want to forgive me, then she needs to leave me alone so I can forgive myself.

    So that’s where I am at now, ladies. I had ended a relationship that I thought at the time was the greatest and best thing that’s ever happened to me despite the obvious. I am picking up the pieces of myself that is left and I am moving on. I enrolled in a new university to get my bachelor’s degree. I got a new job that can be counted as a promotion. I have changed my lifestyle to one that is more decent and honorable.

    It is HARD to be around him, and it is HARD to pick up the pieces to move on and be happy when you honestly feel deep down inside you don’t deserve to be happy anymore. It is HARD to forgive yourself when you look back at the mistakes you’ve made, the lives you’ve destroyed and the anger you have created from your actions…but it NEEDS to be done because after all, YOU DESERVE happiness. YOU DESERVE to be successful in your life, and you DO NOT DESERVE to be the other woman. And no one DESERVES to be shit on by ANYONE.

    Remember that, my ladies. Always, and forever.

  • At 5:27 pm on May 28, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    Did anyone end up pregnant?

  • At 11:19 am on May 30, 2011, guilty as hell commented:

    Was doing so good but I slept with him again!! I hate myself for this!! He is like a drug that I can’t stay away from. I need help.

  • At 2:31 am on June 3, 2011, feelingweak commented:

    Started to write something and it was just was way too long so long story short this married guy is 31, 11-12 yrs older than me from our first conversation (before I knew he was married) we had such great chemistry it was mindblowing and I remember thinking wow out of all these guys who write to me on this social site he seems like he has his shit together no bs I was instantly intrigued and then dun dun dun he finally sends that message that says I’m married at first like any other woman I was like oh no I have to completly cut off all communication he should not even be on here talking to me in this flirtatious way well that only lasted for a couple hours it took me forever to give him my number and when I eventually did I knew it was bad we would text more than anything and a lot while he was at home on the couch while his wife lay in bed and then one say he finally came to my job on my break and I was just as giggly as a little girl in a cndy store and over the weeks he would say just let me give u oral that’s all I want to do is taste it and I would say no every time and just laugh it off knowing I wanted to let him so bad knowing his age and thinking like he would know exactly what to do I wanted to just try it we would flirt and touch a lot but never letting it go all the way until the one day in my car on the street we just couldn’t help it and then in the car in his moms garage and then in my apt its so good and intense and every time I try to stop I CAN’T we’ve recently taken sort of a big step he has multiple pictures of me in lingerie his phone, one of me behind him with my arms around him us both smiling like a happy couple and a video of us just playing around (non sexual) I’m kind of stressing about this bcuz he says no one will see them but if his wife is the private eye like me she WILL and that scares me we live in a city but its more like a big town because everyone knows everyone but he says she’s moving back out of state in about a month or two and he’s not going with her she pregnant right now and is leaning towards abortion which made him upset he said he figured if thery were married y not keep it so he moved all his stuff out into his moms and said they were broken up I know he’s not going to leave her for me that never was the goal but somethin in me tells me he will be moving as well because no matter how much he has complained about how she doest check on him or even acknowledge him when he walks in the door I know he’s not going to leave they will probably stay married until the kids are grown even if they live states apart I been put in a situation where I can go through the withdrawls and finally be rid of him (even though we still run in the same semi-circle) he going out of town and I won’t see him until next week longest we’ve been apart ever and I’m trying so hard not to think about him but all I can think about is giving him a big hug when he gets back and showin off some new lingerie :-( lord help me I’m becoming the woman I never wanted to be I know I already had put off marriage but now its like I really don’t want it because I know there will always be a girl like me or the many above me that just either need love or simply don’t care after a while even being one of these women myse,f it just amazes me how many of us there are what is marriage anymore sometimes I feel like I could either settle for the wife the house the kids and what looks good on paper and to the public and still be cheated on or be the other woman having crazy wild exciting sex and still somewhat get cheated on just knowingly without a reason to be mad I just don’t know anymore love is mysterious….

  • At 6:20 pm on June 6, 2011, tired of lies commented:

    Ok so I too started sleeping with a married man who I work with almost a year ago. We met at work and at first started innocently flirting but the flirting turned into lunches and before I knew it we where having a full out affair. I love him so much and I know he loves me too. He has been married fifteen years and has a beautiful wife who treats him wonderful and he has to beautiful daughters. His daughters are 12 and 9. His wife found out about us after listening in on one of our phone conversations. She has been putting up with this for almost a year now and she is determined to keep her family together. He stays at my apartment all the time and he tells me he never really fell in love with his wife. He loves her and cares about her but is not attracted to her physically. I will call him FC since those are his initials. He would leave his wife for me if it wasn’t for the kids. FC has tried leaving but always misses his girls. I got pregnant back in November and we decided not to keep the baby because of how hard it would be. I know she knows that he is only there for his girls. I will never give up on him. We do love each other so much it’s hard to put into words. He is with her right now trying to work things out for the sake of his family. I hate it when he is not here. The funny thing is he will come running back like he always does. I feel sorry for his wife. They haven’t slept together since November. She hates that she is more like a old friend and I’m his lover. We have amazing sex and if she knew how often she would be shocked. I miss him so much!! Can’t wait to feel his touch again.

  • At 1:30 pm on June 11, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    Seriously???

  • At 2:09 pm on June 16, 2011, better off commented:

    I did it!! Finally broke it off with my married man! It’s been two month’s since we talked. Extremely proud of myself for getting out before it was to late.

  • At 9:35 pm on July 5, 2011, Kim commented:

    Im currently in a long term relationship (11 years), my partner and I have two children together and have always had a fairly good relationship. Recently, I’ve started seeing a guy from work (also in a long term relationship of 13 years). I know what Im doing is wrong - both to my partner and his, but when ever Im with him I feel amazing. I just wanna know what I should do? I have no intention on leaving my partner, and I’m pretty sure he is the same - should I continue to have sex with this man, or cut all ties??? Please help…

  • At 5:11 pm on July 9, 2011, Hayley commented:

    All of you are idiots.

  • At 11:11 am on July 11, 2011, Cody commented:

    I’m a dude sleeping with a married man. Haha. I don’t feel bad at all because if it werent me it would be someone else and he obviously isn’t with his wife for sexual reasons. And he is so hot. Sure, he’s a douche bag, but he is great in bed and that’s really all I’m looking for right now. I do feel bad for his wife, but only because she’s married to a closeted man who could never love her the way she wants.

  • At 5:51 pm on July 18, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    I have been sleeping with a married man and I can not say that I am liking it. Not that the sex isnt good because most generally it is. But I keep waiting for the truth to come out and it will devastate everyone involved. I regret what I did and I am feeling very guilty about it. I wish I hadnt done it but I did and there is no way to take it back. I do know it will NEVER happen again. Ive never done this type of thing, not even with a man in a relationship let alone married. I am disgusted with myself. I want to tell my friend that Ive been sleeping with her friends husband but I know that it will totally ruin our friendship. Her husband knows but he isnt saying anything either. I feel bad that he is keepin this from his wife and to make matters worse now that he knows that I was with his married friend he now wants to be with me. Its making a horrible situation even worse. I just want it to all be over with.

  • At 3:45 am on July 28, 2011, k commented:

    I met this guy about 9 months ago and he was everything I want in a man. He told me two weeks ago that he was married and I feel horrible. I have never wanted to be the other woman so I broke it off immediately but I still find myself missing him and thinking about him non stop. I am so confused!

  • At 12:58 pm on August 4, 2011, Jen commented:

    This sounds crazy but I feel like I am digging a hole for myself…I am married and my co-worker is married with 2 kids…He told me that he really likes me at a work happy hour one time and expressed that he wants to have sex with me..we made out and nothing else happened. It’s been a month and we’ve been flirting a lot more….he is everything that I want in a man (except the cheating part) I am so curious about what is like to have sex with him…I know this is sooo wrong but I can’t stop thinking about it….We both have really strong attraction to each other.

    I tell myself this is going to end like everyone else (meaning NOWHERE) and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feeling. I see him at work all the time and I don’t know what to do.

  • At 10:33 pm on August 5, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    I read many of these comments and have noticed the similarities. I am one of the wives and just wanted to offer a different perspective. I just want to say that the boys just say their wives are not having sex with them. I think they still are in many cases. They just say that to you so you will give them a good roll. I think the guys know it makes you feel good to give them what you think they are not getting at home. They also say they are just there for the kids but having a family is really a nice thing and the guys really do like their families, too. I think it basically just boils down to being a really mean thing to do to someone. It is mean to sleep with you girls because the guys might bring some disease home to the wife. That is really mean, don’t you think? Or you might get pregnant and then that is really mean to all the kids, don’t you think? If you are single and then end up breaking up a marriage or even if the family manages to stay together with the wife knowing what you did, you should apologize to the wife. Woman to woman–just apologize for being mean. If the wife doesn’t know, however, and the husband wants to work it out with his wife, just let him work it out but don’t tell the poor wife. That is unnecessary and kind of mean, don’t you think? Hopefully, there are no babies or diseases and hopefully the family can be okay. Hopefully you girls will find someone to have a family with (if that is what you want)but try not to put yourselves in positions where you will be alone with a boss or a married man. That way you can nip it in the bud before anything has a chance to get going. Keep yourselves open and available for your own sexy husband or hot single co-worker.

  • At 1:24 pm on August 15, 2011, married women's enemy commented:

    I’m not sure why but I seem to by pursued a LOT by men who are either “taken” or married. I’m almost thirty, divorced, been in a serious relationship post divorce and find myself happiest in a relationship. When I’m single, though, of course I find myself out with my single friends. I share custody with my ex so when I don’t have my child, going out and having a little fun helps pass the time I guess. I don’t NEED to have a man, but do love the attention from men when walking into a place, at work, in the mall, etc. It rarely seems like I’m approached by a decent guys who’s actually available. I would have never in a million years thought I’d give the thought of starting up something with a married man. After my last serious relationship ended, I needed some time to heal, and wasn’t looking for a commitment. I also don’t feel like “hook ups” are even worth it though…from a women’s perspective. I met this man about a month ago through friends. I found out initially that he was married, and within minutes, and friend told me he was very UNHAPPILY married…that meant nothing to me. Married is married, right? For some reason, though….we started talking, and in the “group setting” exchanged numbers, and very casually started texting one another for a few weeks. It became flirtatious, and I guess you could say he was “filling the need” at the time. Now, we’re constantly on the phone, texting. This weekend we had our first night together and it was amazing. Of course, lip service I’m sure, he says he wants a divorce, and wants to get out of his marriage. At this point I don’t care. That’s his own problem, not mine. I am, however, worried, that because our chemistry is so strong, and that the sex was SO good, that I’ll become attached to him and eventually want more from him. It’s only going to get “hotter and heavier” from here. Hoping I can keep this very casual and that no one gets hurt.

  • At 4:02 pm on August 31, 2011, Northern Dude commented:

    Wow. It’s interesting how these threads attract “Man hating vow police”. Listen, I’ve read 1000 of these posts and although some men are just cheating DOGS, *most* of the men who are contemplating having an affair (or doing it already) are badly starved for affection. I have a theory about why men are more likely to cheat (and not divorce ‘fair and square’ like women are more inclined to do). A woman can claim “emotionally abandonment” and divorce and walk away in GREAT SHAPE financially. She gets child support (which is fair) but she can also get alimony EVEN if she joins up with another man that makes as much or even more. This is simply nonsense (and proof women are still yet not equal to men but that’s another topic). So men, starved for affection after being ‘rightly’ cut off (yeah right) are more inclined to get some lovin on the side than lose their life’s savings and equity just to get “formal” freedom from her.

    If you ladies want us to come clean, divorce you and get our “loving” the “proper” way, then make divorce more fair. You can’t have these extraordinarily punitive and one-sided divorce laws and expect men to “do the right thing”. There is no “right thing” when faced with financial ruin and risking never seeing your kids again.

    Women want the best of both worlds as usual.

    I totally understand why a man in a sexless marriage would cheat and not divorce. If he cheats and gets caught, he’s ruined anyways. But by cheating, he’s got a chance. If he “does the right thing and divorces her first”, he’s got to give up everything he’s ever worked for to get love and intimacy his marriage WAS SUPPOSED TO PROVIDE FOR HIM PER THE VOWS THAT **SHE** TOOK. What about her vows? The man hating vow police women here only talk about his vows. Not hers. If she wants to become a sexless malcontent SHE CAN and HE HAS TO LIKE IT. Ha.

    Cheat away boys. This ain’t a fair fight.

    When women speak out against these shameless divorce laws and make divorce a viable option, us men in sexless marriages will GLADLY leave. We’ll happily walk and let some other poor sap try and please her.

    When women do this, they will finally be equal to men!

  • At 10:12 am on September 6, 2011, the wife commented:

    Hi all, i am a mother of 3 and my sons age 7, 5 abd 3. 4 years back i found out my husband infidelity and caught him red handed in a hotel room. He was with his ex-colleauge and she is a married women. I forgave him but he denied his affair still. At that moment, i was pregnant. He came back and kept blaming me as the cause. Then, he left a few months after i delivered my 3rd son. He is now with the same lady and worst thing was he had sex in front if my sons during their visitation. I had once love him and i do not know why do i and my kids have to suffer from his and his girl friend affair? We are innocent and if a man or women wants to play on their sexual life, please do jot get married.
    Please women, do put yourself into the wife shoes. You may hurt her and the kids too.
    By the way, he punched my tummy when i was 2mths pregnant. He even pushed me when i was 6mths pregnant. I hope women who is tge weaker vessel may have to help other women in need. Now, i have to bear the expenses of my kids and he is having fun with the other lady.

  • At 1:00 am on September 17, 2011, msboston commented:

    I’m involved with a married man but he is also my best friend and has been for years. We are coworker as as well. I’m going thru a divorcing after 17 years of marriage. He and his wife were couple friends of me and my husband. When my marriage broke up, my friend took my side and his wife took my husband’s side. He was there for me during the first difficult months of being single in so many ways….one thing led to another and we have now been involved for 9 months. Our relationship is intense on every level: sexual, emotional because of our longtime friendship. I never cheated on my husband and never dated a married man when I was single. He has cheated on his wife since the day they met with numerous women. As his best friend I know these things. Our relationship is different because he really does love me, but I don’t think he will ever leave her because she makes his life financially comfortable and they have a son in his teens. I have tried on numerous occasions to end it, but he sucks me right back everytime. He knows me so well. He knows everything about me and how to get to my heart. It is so painful knowing he is out to dinner with her or on a family vacation. He gets extremely jealous of any man that comes near me. I wish I could end it but it will mean losing my best friend, my support system, and many uncomfortable moments at work. Bottom line I love this man and it is not easy to give him up. I would if I could

  • At 3:28 am on September 25, 2011, Crazy in Love commented:

    Hi I’m 19 years old and had been friend wiyh a 32 year old man and his wife for 4 years. I became great friends with the husband so much that I sneeked around with him and one fine day I got pregnant . Now I want to live with him to make it a home for the baby. Does anybody know if this is possible. Oh he has been a wife cheater all his life. Anybody have any ideas ?

  • At 8:42 am on October 12, 2011, needy commented:

    Oh my god.. i slept with a married man, i just got way to drunk and ended up sleeping with him in his wifes bed with there family photos everywere eeeek, plus she is sweet as pie and 2 beautiful kids.the shame is eating me up inside. any advice??

  • At 3:50 pm on October 14, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    Dear all, from someone who has been there, done that & got the T shirt-don’t do it, top doing it & get out. Yes we all love them, yes its the best sex we’ve ever had but its not reality. You’ll spend days, months, years with messed up emotions of “does he really love me” “will we ever be together” “could I ever trust him” “what will people think of me” while the rest of your friends & family are getting on with their lifes, getting married, having kids, making a family, making a life!! I’ve been involved with a married man now for 5 years & I’m done!! He’s decided now he wants to leave his wife to start a life, a family with me but its too little, too late-toodaloo mutha f**ker!! Good luck all………………………….

  • At 8:29 pm on October 19, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    I am also in the same situation as you ladies. I met this cute guy a year ago ad he told me from day 1 that he was married with kids, i told myself that I will never slee ith this man but when he kissed and went down on me I couldn’t resist him. The sex and the kissing was so wonderful I have never had such great sex in such a long time. We are still together and so inlove with each other but I do feel so lonenly when he is not around.However I am suffering from emotional stress because people judge me and my colegue keeps on telling me that I am so bwautiful ann young, but one thing that they do not realise is that being beauyiful doesn’t bring you a basket of good men but a bad one because most man become sexually attracted to you becaue of being beautiful but I am definately sure that the guy is not using me for sex because when things are not well at home he does’nt come visit me to offload his stress and anger but will always text and tell me that he is feeling down he wont be seeing me today and he loves me as always.

  • At 8:02 pm on November 6, 2011, chris commented:

    I’m sleeping with three married men right now. We’re friends that have sex together. I don’t want them to leave their wives and if they decide not to have sex with me anymore I’m fine with that. Their wives are just not into the sex they’re into and I am. Since sleeping with me, they’ve actually taken their wives out more and spent more family time with their kids. I don’t know if it is guilt or they just aren’t as stressed. Sometimes affairs are just sex. Sometimes the “mistresses” are just having fun and providing stress relief. The problem occurs when women get too attached to a married man. If you’re going to sleep with a married man, accept that he will not leave his wife and if you find yourself fantasizing about him doing so, leave before you get hurt.

  • At 12:56 pm on November 10, 2011, anonymous commented:

    Some men will leave there wives. He left his wife months ago for me when I told him I was seeing someone else. He told his wife that he couldn’t stand the thought of losing me and didn’t want me with any other man but him. We are extremely happy. The only problem is that we are working on our trust issues and he misses seeing his kids everyday. I love him so much and can’t imagine my life without him in it. I hear people say over and over he will never leave. Keep in mind no relationship is the exact same and if your really in love and meant to be it will find a way to happen.

  • At 5:08 am on November 19, 2011, Jennifer Lawson commented:

    I am also involved with and sleeping with a married man. I did not start out to do it but this is what it has become. However I don’t feel that bad it. Not sure what to do.

  • At 8:19 am on November 21, 2011, Anonymous commented:

    you are all whores. Sleeping with a married man.

  • At 8:53 pm on November 30, 2011, frustrated!! commented:

    im suprised at how many of us are in the same situation, im 19 and have started to get involved with my boss at work who is 41 married with 3 kids. we havent done anything except for the odd gropes here and there, we flirt all the time and text even more. its been going on for around 5 months and still nothing has happend but neither of us have really pressed it to be honest. i have tried to not text him back but he drives me crazy and i just cannot help myself!!! i do only want sex from him but i do not want it to lead into anything more, he makes out he hates his wife as she got pregnant a few months into the relationship but i dont think he would ever leave her and i wouldnt want him to but i dont know if i could just have sex with him and leave it at that. he has done all the chasing not me i still now do not hes the one always texting me and forever saying things at work but i dont know if this is just a ego boost for him and whether anything will ever happen, i know he wants to but i dont know whether i should any advice?!?!

  • At 8:20 pm on December 5, 2011, felicia commented:

    IM 18 and have just recently started sleeping with this married man i work with hes amazingly handsome sweet and great to talk to he makes me feel special he is 25 so not that much older than me he hates his wife and tells me how much he cant stand her they have a baby and thats the only reason he married her and is still with her what should i do

  • At 9:11 am on December 17, 2011, Klark commented:

    Good morning mistresses! I am 22 yrs old with an old soul & For over a year, I fantasized about a man I would see every Sunday. Yes, at church. I knew that he (40 yrs old) was married, but I became highly attracted to him. We never spoke any words to each other, just a innocent wave, or smile here and there. [us mistresses come to sites like this because we all are faced with unconscious guilt, and want to vent to other women experiencing what we go through] I never cared about what people thought of me because I’m wise enough to know who I am. A year later, my thoughts got the best of me. There I was at 3:00 am sending a MM a message on Facebook. He INSTANTLY replied. Yes, I pursued him. I didn’t want ANYTHING from him but for him to fulfill my sexual desires. And after conversing, I found out he had those same desires for me. We have a really good friendship. We’re open, honest, and genuinely acceptive of each others feelings. I do not talk about his wife because she has nothing to do with me. I’ve had dreams about having conversations with her, and that’s about it. Me and my MM are away together right now. I’m soaking in the tub reading you ladies post and I feel like we’re in a cult. The thrill is so exciting yet the CONVICTION is powerful! The more I get into the word, the more I know that I will soon have to cut all ties. We also have exclusive sex. Luckily, I haven’t gotten pregnant. We’ve talked about having a “love child” but we could never live ‘that life’ . If we talk we talk, If we don’t we just don’t and I’m okay with that because it’s all fun & games. I know his wife will never find out about us, but the way she looks at me makes me feel like she can see it all over my face. Naturally, because me & this married man are sexually involved, I do find myself liking him more than I should. But I don’t love him. I love how he makes me feel, and there’s a difference. The affair has been going on for over a year now, and I honestly can’t say when we will let our fantasy die.

  • At 9:24 am on December 17, 2011, Klark commented:

    Just like all is fair in love. . . .All is unfair in an affair.

  • At 6:05 pm on January 3, 2012, Confused commented:

    I’m sleeping with married man…I love him and I can’t stop. He says he will leave her when the time is right, but they have only just had a baby and he can’t walk out leaving behind a few week old baby. I’m a mess and I don’t know what to do. He told me he loves me so much it kills him to see me upset, but the reason I’m upset is because I can’t be with the one I love. I’m a mess and don’t know what to do. Help.

  • At 10:17 pm on January 3, 2012, Phoenix_83 commented:

    Wow. Well, I never thought I would do this considering I have morals and ethics when it comes to stuff like this but it’s happened. I have taken the plunge into seeing a married man.

    I’m 28, he’s 2 years younger than me. We went to high school together and we reunited over the internet about a year and a half ago. We were friends in high school, had a lot of the same classes together. After we re-connected online, we became even more close as friends and pretty much were texting each other several times a week. I would go to him for advice on things, he would share funny stories with me to cheer me up and it has been wonderful. He’s been married to his wife for 3 years and they have a baby together. They are both very financially stable, but he’s not happy in their relationship. Ever since she had the baby, she hasn’t wanted to be with him at all. They sleep in seperate beds and hardly see each other because of their work schedules.

    I don’t know how it happened exactly but it just did and it has taken me by surprise. He’s made mention to me long before any of this ever happened that if he wasn’t married, he would sweep me off my feet. He even admitted that he had a huge crush on me in high school… He’s witty, he’s charming, funny and he’s just everything that I’ve wanted with just one problem. He’s married. I don’t know if anything will ever happen to where he’ll leave her considering they have a child together; I’m not really looking for a relationship either. Just like another poster above said, I don’t think I’m cut out for relationships. I’ve been engaged 3 times in my life and have a track record for failed relationships.

    We had been talking over this past week (yeah, I know.. this whole ordeal is in its infancy) about what things would be like… how he’s fell out of love with her - he loves her, but not the same way anymore, along with other things. He decided to come to my house last night and he ended up spending the night with me. I wasnt really quite expecting it, but it was wonderful to say the least. Snuggling on the couch watching a movie, the dinner I cooked for us, and just the overall connection between us. The chemistry without even having done anything other than being close to one another and holding hands. & then the sex was just absolutely amazing. (I’ve been celibate for the past 2 years so it was like a whole new experience for me all over again).

    He makes me feel like I’ve never felt before. I can look into his eyes and see down into his soul and feel what he feels. The way he makes me feel, I can’t quite describe.

    I guess I should be thankful that I have unlimited texts because we have been texting each other like crazy. Every day, I have to delete the thread of text messages because after having 300+ text messages in a thread, it tends to bog down my phone.

    I’m having to keep myself in check with all of this because although things are going the way they are going, I want to keep it as basically a “friends with benefits” type deal and not get too attached. I feel bad for really getting involved in this, but I just can’t stop right now. This feeling we have between us is just too strong.

    I can’t stop thinking about him. He tells me that he can’t stop thinking about me. He’s told me of his dreams he has at night and how I’m always in them.

    I basically keep the ball in his court as far as how things go realizing he still has a wife and kid at home. I don’t want to cause suspicions or keep him from his family so I try and respect that if that makes sense.

    I don’t know where this will lead or if it will even lead to anything… if it does, it does. If it doesn’t, then it doesn’t. We are just taking things one day at a time and see where things lead.

    After leading a life of staunch morals and ethics in relationships only for them to fail, I somehow feel its time to let loose and live a little and see where life takes me.

    I’ll close for now so I can get some rest. I’ve been up since 4am this morning (we spent the entire day together up in the mountains playing in the snow) and I’m awfully tired.

  • At 2:10 pm on January 5, 2012, gaygal commented:

    I just started seeing my coworker i am a gay gal and i have always been cerious of the oppiset sex. he is married with 2 kids he has been telling me about the troubles at home and that its been about a year since him and his wife has sex and that she is very verbly abusive and i hear it all the time when she calls him! i was intreaged with the idea of actually trying it out! we were only texting as friends for 3months and then we started having sexual dreams about each other but we thought that it would be wrong to talk about them. finally we started talking about it!:( i know that i shouldn’t have took as far as teasing. one day we were working alone in the office and he pulled me in for a kiss i know i shouldnt have but i was longing for it! every day i see his wife come in with their boys and she calls the office all the time. About 3 weeks ago we actually did meet and made love…. i felt super excited but after words i felt like shit because he left to go home to his wife. now i know that it is for fun and that its harmless and the passion is amazing. we have so much in common and we are very connected in a lot of ways. he really gets me and i really enjoy the attention but i cant help but think that im really doing something wrong. i have been thinking about breaking it off cuz its now a lunch affair and i cant do this anymore but i feel like i just want to continue! i need some help to talk to me help me make my decision! :( i really like him and i never felt this way about a man! i constently think about if we wernt careful and we ended up having a child. i cant live with my self if it were to get that far but i really love the way he looks at me and the way he makes me feel. ugh! help me!!!!!!

  • At 2:39 pm on January 9, 2012, Confused commented:

    It’s so confusing….I find my head is tell me one thing but my heart is saying something completely different. I can relate to possibly every story on here. No one at all understands unless they are in the situation themselves. I have always been a very moral person and now look what I’m doing. I feel disgusting. A dirty little secret that will he never wants to come out…but then I feel so amazing when I’m with him. He makes me feel alive and happy. We get on amazing.

    I find I resent her (the wife) as she doesn’t deserve him… He does everything for her and she doesn’t respect him. I bumped into them the other day and she just looked do grumpy (she has no idea who I am). She tells him what to do and he does it.

    Im going to talk to him at some point this week and tell him either leave her or say goodbye to me. This way I will stop getting in any deeper and therefore stop hurting so much.

    It’s just such a messed up situation… If I could go back in time I would not let this happen again. If its just for fun that you are sleeping with the married man….please just leave before you get too caught up and hurt…I have definitely found out the hard way.

  • At 2:41 pm on January 11, 2012, Caught in a tricky situation... commented:

    To gaygal- just know your not the only one in the situation..mines been going on 4 months now and I can’t see an out. ALL I think about is him. He makes me feel amazing…but also the feeling I get is absolute lonliness. I hate not being able to hug him when I want or see him when I feel down.

    He said he will leave her, but at the right time as they have a 7 week old. He hasn’t been happy for a long time before (we work together and have been great friends for nearly 2 years and we never thought this would happen…but it did) so I know he hasn’t been happy and she practically forced him to have another child. He felt like He owed her the world as when they were together a MONTH (after breaking up numerous times in 3 years) she stood by him when he got ill. Once he got out of hospital she had planned the wedding…he walked down the aisle a week after he got out.

    Now he’s stuck, they don’t sleep in the bed and haven’t for ages (again known as a friend) he sleeps on a completely different floor in their house…te house that he bought and will give her once he leaves.

    It’s like he’s stuck, he’s loves his kids so much he doest want his daughter to think that he walked out when she was just born.

    So I’m now in the situation of waiting. Feeling horrible and jealous. I didn’t like her before because of how she is. Now I’m jealous of her and resent her for the control she has. She knows he would do anything for the kids and has made it clear that she will take him to court when he leaves to make sure he doesn’t get to see them as much as he would like. That kills him.

    How can someone want someone to be with them even though they know that they don’t want to be together? It puzzles me.

  • At 7:52 am on January 19, 2012, unbelievably sorry commented:

    I have been screwing a married coworker for several months. I am so disgusted with myself and my decision I don’t even know what to do. I have never slept with a married man before and thought I never would. I guess I just needed the attention and of course the “wrongness” of it is a turn on. I am under no illusion that this is going anywhere or he will leave his wife or that I am anything other than a piece of ass. I enjoy the sex but not the feelings I have about what I am doing and the disrespect for someone else’s marriage. Every day I think about how I would feel if I were her and found out. If we get caught we will both be fired, and yet I can’t seem to stop it. I really want to stop this but not sure how to do it because we have to work together every day.

  • At 4:45 pm on January 26, 2012, Attracted2theTaken commented:

    My last post on February 2, 2011 was one that I was so happy about. My post prior to that was me talking about how happy I was to be “with” a married man. I ended it with him and began dating this “new guy”. KARMA IS A BITCH!!! This guy lied to me and told me everything I needed and wanted to hear. We dated for a little over 2 months before he DUMPED ME VIA A TEXT!!! Yes, a text. Talk about heartbroken and painful…

    I removed myself from the dating scene for a while and really “found” myself. I had to look deep within and cleanse myself. I was putting out some bad karma and eventually it came back to bite me in the ass! Hard!

    Too all the wives out there that have been hurt by these women sleeping with your husband (I was once upon a time that girl) I will say this….I am sorry. And to all the women who are sleeping with these unavailable men..STOP! You are worth more than what you are getting. That is a dead-end road. I know.

    It’s time to stop reaching for people who are not reaching back.

  • At 10:47 am on January 28, 2012, Miss Independent commented:

    I was sleeping with my married manager for a couple months. We dated 4 years ago when he was recently divorced from his 1st wife. He was an ashhole then, and he still is!
    Lol… I stopped talking to him completely for 3 years, which of course made him even more intrigued. Last year I got a promotion to a role that reports to him. Such a huge mistake! We’re both in Management so I know what it means to be an effective manager, but he’s a completely ineffective manager. It’s his management style that’s really turned me off more than the fact that he’s on wife #2.

    Obviously marriage holds no value to him, because I would tread very lightly before we started to hang out again, but he said I was thinking too much about things. I’ve never met his wife. He has a picture of her on his desk that is hidden behind the cupholder for his pens & pencils. Not to be mean, but I see why he covers up her pic! Lol… He never mentions her, but my heartaches for her. I hope she doesn’t think he’s committed or loyal to her.

    I had to take a step back & really think about what I was doing to myself moreso than his wife, since he obviously doesn’t care about either of us. I haven’t spoken to him outside of work in over a week, but sure enough he texted me this week trying to hook up. I ignored his ass! About a month ago I blocked him from contacting me on my personal cell, so I’ve been really trying to focus on ways to remove the personal tie with him, just so I can stomach seeing him at the office. I’m a beautiful (inside & out), successful, single woman with no kids; I own my own home and I have a connection with a higher power that allows me to believe that I’m worth far more than being this guy’s mistress.
    I’m not one to judge anyone’s situation, but know that all of you deserve more than you’re getting (myself included)! :-) I wish you all the best!

  • At 4:32 pm on February 3, 2012, Get out now before your in too deep! commented:

    It has now been 5 months since we first happened. I was speaking to him on the phone this morning before work, Fridays are the evenings that we get to spend together as this is the only night that he does not stay at home with her and the kids. She has now decided that this is her day to go out and he should stay in to look after the kids…fair enough for her to go out…but he just said ‘ok’. If I actually meant anything to him I would think that he would say he’s already made
    Plans. She went out last Friday also meaning that I haven’t really seen him and he hasnt really tried. That was a big eye opener for me. He’s married. Hes got 2 kids. How the hell can I do this to another human being? I was dazed and falling for a man that I couldn’t have. So many empty promises that I have heard…IM WORTH MORE THAN THAT.

    I’m a 22 year old, I have so much love to give, I’m attractive - I constantly turn down guys because I had fallen for this married man.

    Im waiting to talk to him to tell him that this is it, again when he’s able to talk. I have so much to say to him and it kills me I can’t just call him to talk about it.

    I’m in such a mess I really wish that someone had told me this would all end in tears. Instead I had to learn the hard and painful way. It’s horrible, please get out and save yourself the torture of always being the bit on the side and nothing more. No one deserves this…on both sides.

  • At 9:30 pm on February 5, 2012, lost commented:

    I’m 18 and have stated talking to a married man and he is 26 yrs older than me. We have been talking for about a month now and I really like him. We have made plans to have our firsy sexual encounter but im so nervous. I dnt wan this karma to come back on me. I honestly just have the desire to sleep with him this one time and never again but i know he has fallin had over me. HE tells me he misses me, wants to buy me thing and always says that he wish he could spend all the time in th world with me. Im no romantic but i sort of like him just as much. im contemplating on just sleeping with him this one time and telling him no more after that. i want to be with him sexualy for some reason i have this srong urge to be with him. I guess I really dnt know what to do my thoughts are all over the place….

  • At 9:34 am on February 18, 2012, Laura commented:

    I slept with a married man a week ago. I’m single; I was out on the town with some friends and I met this guy and a group of his friends who were in town just for the weekend. I knew from the word go he was married and I never intended on doing anything…but the more we talked the more we connected…even though he was telling me he was sure his wife of 6 months was the one for him…but he admitted that he was sure only because ‘if I wasn’t, I’d be doing nasty things to you right now’. Well it was all downhill from there! A short while later we were kissing passionately, I just didn’t want to let him go… and we went back to my place. Although we actually didn’t go ALL the way we did everything else possible. He was saying all the right things..I was basically putty in his hands. The next day he had to go back to his home town. We have exchanged a couple of emails but there’s nothing to suggest he wants to continue seeing me. Do I feel bad? Yes…I feel bad because I don’t feel bad about what we did! If he were to call me tomorrow to tell me he was back in town, I’d be really happy. I’ve no idea whether this was his first time cheating or whether it’s something he does regularly! I just feel confused really….

  • At 4:14 pm on February 27, 2012, finding it hard to walk away commented:

    I’ve been sleeping with a married man for nearly a year, we have a real connection, although i feel bad for his family at the same time iv fallen for him and he has me, im only 22 and have my whole life ahead of me, but him and his wife are in there early forty’s,and have done the whole marriage and kids thing! i think i should end things as hes never going to leave her and i feel i deserve to experience the special things in life prehaps with someone my own age, marriage ect. i am finding it hard to walk away!!

  • At 7:41 pm on February 27, 2012, confused commented:

    im 20 years old and completely confused. Around 6 months ago me and my manager at work started messaging, hes 43 married with 3 kids… the messages started off flirty we have texted alot over these 6 months including dirty messages. Nothing sexual has actually happened he goes hot and cold on many occasions which makes me think is this just an ego boost for him with me being 20?
    I let this man just text me and i will text back most of the time when i should just ignore him but he seems to know what to do and i cant help but reply. Ive never felt so pathetic its not like hes a catch or anything he just knows what to say to me to make me actually like him. I stopped replying for around 2 months and it was so awkward in work he kept trying to message me but i ignored him which took some restraint, then i replied last week for some reason but i know nothing will ever happen as surely it would of happened by now?! Help im so confused!!!!

  • At 7:41 pm on February 27, 2012, confused commented:

    im 20 years old and completely confused. Around 6 months ago me and my manager at work started messaging, hes 43 married with 3 kids… the messages started off flirty we have texted alot over these 6 months including dirty messages. Nothing sexual has actually happened he goes hot and cold on many occasions which makes me think is this just an ego boost for him with me being 20?
    I let this man just text me and i will text back most of the time when i should just ignore him but he seems to know what to do and i cant help but reply. Ive never felt so pathetic its not like hes a catch or anything he just knows what to say to me to make me actually like him. I stopped replying for around 2 months and it was so awkward in work he kept trying to message me but i ignored him which took some restraint, then i replied last week for some reason but i know nothing will ever happen as surely it would of happened by now?! Help im so confused!!!!

  • At 2:52 pm on April 3, 2012, IKnowIt'sWrongButItFeelsSoRight commented:

    Well, I actually just fooled around with a married man last night. We’ve known each other for 3 weeks, but we instantly clicked. He’s unhappy because he’s in a relationship with someone who doesn’t trust him. They were forced to get married by her parents because he got her pregnant. He didn’t want to run out on his kid, so he stuck around and got married at the age of 19. He said he’s gotten to the point in their marriage where they’re together for the kids. We have an interesting connection of if I’m upset, he feels it. Once I was crying in a field and he biked by and saw me. He said he really needed to go that way for some reason. We had quite a bit of fun last night, unintentionally. We both know we turn each other on, and last night was a night of no regrets. I kept telling him we shouldn’t do this,he said I know. We looked at each other and just couldn’t stop. I think we’re going to keep seeing each other. It just seems so right, we talk, we’re open and I think I love him. We did agree we’re not sure if we’re looking for a relationship, maybe just acceptance and satisfying urges. I guess we’ll see, but I do feel a bit of guilt, because I have met his kids. However, we both believe in one life, live in the moment.

  • At 7:10 am on April 5, 2012, annoymous commented:

    I am 29 years old and I need advice. I am sleeping with an ex, we were together for two years till we went our separate ways. Six years have past, we have kept in contact and continued to casually sleep together. On a year break he married another woman. Now we have started sleeping together again, he says that he still loves me and that he and his wife no longer have sex and he never loved her to begin with (I know this to be a lie otherwise they would not have become married to begin with). He is developing property with his wife and his says that he cannot leave her due to financial reasons. I still love him but I don’t know what to do. Will he really leave her or is financial reasons just an excuse (aka keeping me on the hook)?

  • At 5:11 am on May 1, 2012, jimbob commented:

    I’ve been married 22 years, the last four or five difficult, but I’ve never cheated or even tried to. Last year I met a girl much younger than me through work. She flirted with me, very blatant with it to, and im not ashamed to admit that fell for her. Quite pretty too with a nice bum and good at her work. I did feel guilty about my feelings for her, but never did anything about it. As the year progressed I agreed to go to counselling with my wife, true quite hard too. Told her about the girl, talked about my feelings at counselling, (the woman couldn’t.believe that I’d. Never asked for this girls no. Or asked where she lived or asked her out for a drink. I hadnt seen the girl for a while when I caught up with her in another department . We talked for a while then I told her about trying to sort out my marriage. She went ballistic “dont tell me about your wife” and all that, and hasn’t spoken to me since. I’ve since found out that she has a history with married men, trying to get with them as she has had no luck with single ones.
    Why am I writing this? Just to say there are good honest men out there. Not many I admit but if she was a decent girl and realised this, now I am getting divorced she could of found true love. That means now I know what she’s like, I could never trust her.

  • At 1:12 pm on June 16, 2012, adriana commented:

    You wanna here a fucked up situation? here you go: welcome to a shit life:
    I’m sleeping with a men that is not married but has the same girlfriend for years- All my life, I refused to have any relationship with men that already were with another woman: Just for respect toward the family and the kids.
    But recently, I did it-
    I’m a very prety girl, and men are generally very afraid of me- I’m independant and I guess I’m not that stupid- All my life, the only thing I ever wanted was love,and even if people think that a woman like me has it all, i miss the most important thing in life: I’m always single, and this for years.
    Recently this man came up to me, and he was not afraid: a amaing gentlemen- At first i didnt really want to have nothing to do with him, but little by little we start to like each other- He was honest with me about his girlfriend, another girl he is having a relationship for 2 years already…. We have very heavy past both of us and we appreciated our mutual honesty-
    Then we t started to have sex: and the quimistry was even stronger: we started to be friends, lovers, and we really started to fall in love…He treated me like a queen and I was really falling for this guy……Until, I forgot my phone on his car like a dumb bitch (I so happy that he makes me loose my mind) and that he forgot the hotel paper where I was staying-
    The morning, his wife through him out of the house, and came to visit me at the hotel with an army of girlfriends….
    Even if its really difficult to understand, this man is actually a great guy, and except the cheating he is perfect, a straight 10.
    He has it all and so do all his friends: they’r young, beuatiful, funny, rich, passionate…They are all in a relationship with girlfriends for years that have all childrens: but their women never had to work one single day of they life, nore to worry about anything: This men love their women in their own way and the women actually know they are cheating on them…but they wont leave the house, even if the men promisses to give them half of everything they have…All their women have lovers as well…..
    So at this point I really wonder who are the worst in the story-
    -The one that cheats, is honest about it, but that acts like a men taking care of everything if something happens?
    - The one that is getting cheat on but decide to stay for what ever reason and have some lovers?
    -The one that is getting out with “married “man and having a good time for the first time of her life?

    “My” guy loves hi girlfriend, they have 1 kid and share a commun life for years- I think he is going to do anything to get his girlfriend back and I can’t blame him for that because I love him-And obviously, our relationship is in stand-by: because even if the fact that he is guilty to cheat on his girlfriend for years, it’s the first time that she catches him that way and it is because of me- so i get all the blame-
    I’m the one getting fucked over- i guess he is too as well- his girlfriend will be fine no matter what-

    Morality, learn from my story, don’t leave any evidence NO-WHERE, and protect your heart, because fairy taile does exist, where the man leave his wife for the lover, but not in many cases: it’s more likely the contrary-

    Morality

  • At 2:53 pm on June 17, 2012, kaylie commented:

    I met this guy when i was 19…. Im now 27. He’s been married since i met him….and we basically just had a friendly relationship with some friendly flirting every now and then. Nothing ever happened. But we did both acknowledge the chemistry between us….but we never acted on it. I’ve seen what cheating does to a marriage and i swore i would never be part of that no matter what. 8 years we ignored that chemistry….and then recently we slept together…. And it was the best sex of my life….and i don’t know if i have the strength to say no now. But at the same time, i feel like such an awful person. I should be avoiding a situation where this could happen again..but i am not confident i can do that.

  • At 4:00 pm on June 24, 2012, Anonymous commented:

    i slept with a married man of 3 years the other night….i actually work with him…he is one of the artists i work for…unfortunately i have slept with many other guys that work with and one of them being my boss….i am in love with my boss but i slept with this married man…I felt horrible about it and dont know how to get it out of my head or at least my heart….I hope that he does not say anything to anyone about it cuz he said he will not and he would be in trouble if he did…ive come to the conclusion that i dont have much emotional attachment to guys….but get scared that soeone will find out….any advice?

  • At 2:56 pm on June 26, 2012, kriss commented:

    I AM AN 19 AND I AM SLEEPING WITH A MARRIED MAN HE IS 30 AND HE IS A FRIEND OF MY FAMILY, HIS WIFE AND HIM PLUS THEIR DAUGHTER SPEND A LOT OF TIME IN MY HOUSE BC LIKE I SAID THEY ARE REALLY CLOSE FRIENDS OF OURS. I CANT SAY HOW IT HAPPENED BC IT JUST HAPPENED. HIM AND HIS FAMELY GO TO OUR SAME CHURCH I SEE HIM EVERY DAY HIS WIFE AND ME ARE GOOD FRIENDS TOO I KNOW I SHOULD STOP BC THIS MAKES ME A HORRIBLE PERSON ESPECIALLY BC I ALWAYS SAID I WOULD NEVER BE THE OTHER WOMAN AND HATED ALL THE OTHER WOMANS BC MY PARENTS GOT DIVORCE BC MY DAD CHEATING ON MY MOM … I FEEL BAD BUT I CANT STOP WE HAVE ONLY SLEP TOGETHER ONES BUT I WANT TO DO IT AGAIN UGH I AM SO CONFUSE I KNOW I SHOULD STOP, BUT I CANT STOP HE MAKES ME HAPPY … I AM YOUNG AND IDK WHAT I AM DOING

  • At 9:36 pm on July 23, 2012, From the Idiot ''bit on the side'' commented:

    Guilty as charged, I am sleeping with a married man who has two children and has been with his partner for 25 years - married for 5 years. He claims she isn’t interested in sex and that other than a unenthusiastic attempt once every two months or so, that their marriage is sexless (although I don’t really believe that, you know that old chestnut ladies!)

    yes, I’m a total idiot but I can’t help myself when it comes to him. So basically I am trapped in a world of pain,however the sex is amazing and seeing him is such a thrill, so much fun, I’m addicted to it. I’m like a junkie he is my drug of choice. before I met him, I didn’t have any fun in my life, I had forgotten what it was and he makes me feel sexy and desired, that’s a very powerful thing and men know that. He is in the country as an expat and he will eventually go home, maybe within 12 months or so…I don’t really know when, too scared to ask! That actually for me is the killer, even given his situation, the fact that one day soon he will tell me that he’s leaving……it’s going to hurt me allot because I know that I will never see him again. I’ve broken up with him twice, then missed the sex and I guess the validation, and taken him back. I’ve never been so sexually attracted to a man as I am to him, it’s so so not fair!
    The affair is not a thrill for me, I don’t need to sneak around I am single so why do I do it? Had he been single and we had met naturally, I would be the luckiest girl in the world however it’s not how it is, it is what it is. I know that he will not leave his wife for me, i’m not so stupid that I live in hope, and anyway it sounds like a double standard to say this however would I really want a man who is a serial cheater? probably not!!!
    So basically Girls, let this little story be a deterant to you all - I have learnt my lesson and can I tell you that if another married man comes near me that I will be running in the other direction as fast as my little legs can carry me! Unfortunately I am one of those people that needs to learn the hard way, and boy have I learnt my lesson bad!!! I suspect that most women who are seeing or have seen a married man would vow ‘never again’. saying that it’s an experience that I don’t regret, however I won’t be repeating, proceed with caution ladies! Oh and BTW, I think that men leaving their wives for mistresses is an urban myth - why would they? We allow them to have their family life with the woman they truly love, whilst having his little bit on the side which is exciting and ego boosting for him - women make decisions based on emotion, men don’t and they fully exploit that fact to their advantage, they know we are hurting but they ignore it for their own gain……they also can sleep at night as long as they don’t get found out, they are quite remarkable creatures really. Being with this man has confirmed my worst fears about men, and that if you suspect your partner is cheating on you, then he probably is! saying this, even after all the pain men put us through, we still love them, the problem though is that they don’t love us back.

  • At 11:08 am on July 31, 2012, weeds commented:

    m married now 15 years Ive known my husband since 17.I pretty much have been with him most of my life.We are still trugging a little through all the murkey water.We got out of the quicksand through the dirty, smelly,thick mud like I said were in the things are looking up for our Family.we are blessed God has given us so much to be Gratefully.we have 4 beautiful children a wonderful house.But by no means is life all peachy, all the time.The thing is we have to work our a**es off every day and gotta run i will finish this later I

  • At 12:57 pm on July 31, 2012, weeds commented:

    Our marriage has been hanging by a thread we love eachother AND HAVE spent many beautiful days events family ect.This is an important time for me , long time comin the kid are estatic to go on a vacation.I didnt pay so much attention on being pissed off I just continue to work until we get to shore “is just a way to express what im trying to say” What im trying to say people is that if someone were to do that to me.I know it can happen to anyone including myself. now heres the other side “I have invested every thing I have everything I know and I find out my husband is with another women . Has anyone ever experienced dieing an internial death? well i have a few times. I dont recommend it.And I pray and ask for safety from this evil disease,and not just for myself but for the person who is paralyzed from theirs or others choices. I had a gambeling problem which in fact I hurt my husband and my family. 5 years ago.Im here to tell you that Jesus Loves You.He knows you by name.I was called to repent to the lord the wrongs that I have done. Have you ever heard anyone say God will talk to you out of the Bible. I never got that one until one day as I weeped and weeped,literally.God spoke to my Heart, out of Isaiah.There is, I Belive that every human being has a place within our Hearts/souls we depend on Love we all want that individual attention.to be glorified. Im learning that i am very self centered, but I too have those same needs its just knowing where to take this kind of stuff fortunetely I have a friend who has showed me support helping me through all my Im not happy because…..wa wa but those are the real reasons and I know how to justify things my way and belive im right.its only hurt me and others again.One thing I think about is that we all have a role //purpose every action every thought life on this Earth whatever were going through I think it has something to do with afterlife and what will do in the KINGDOM….I think that we are like jewels,rubies, diamonds, & pearls//// YES YOU TOO,,take care people

  • At 8:07 pm on August 5, 2012, stephanie lovehandles jones commented:

    I am a whore who lives in san antonio, tx and works at the state hospital…where I should be admitted, and cheated on my boyfriend chris. Im just a fat transexual bitch who cant have kids so I enjoy trashing other peoples relationships. I cant help myself. I guess because I dont know what love is and dont like to see anyone around me happy, you know because my daddy raped me. Then after that I was just a fucked up piece of shit. I started sleeping with everybody. My stepdad, my boyfriends brother (dont tell his girl) anything that would have me. I just like being a whore. I have to Im too shitfaced and fat for anyone to want to have sex with me willingly.

  • At 1:07 pm on August 7, 2012, ellen commented:

    i actually cant wait to tell my lusty little story.
    i’m 22 i met a married man 20 years old than me this summer on a business trip. things got pretty wild once we started drinking and we ended up sleeping together. i chalked it up to a drunken mistake but the next day i knew he felt differently when he grabbed my bum and kissed me while i was making breakfast. he couldnt keep his paws off of me the rest of the trip, and we ended up sleeping together again, and i feel so very guilty about our week-long affair. however, i’m very intrigued by him. he was the best that i’ve ever had in the sack!

    luckily he lives on the west coast and i live in the midwest. however, he has contacted me and told me that he wants to come to my city for business. he constantly compliments me and tells me what he ‘loves’ about me. i would have to say that i am definitely caught up in this lust for him. i’m consumed by fantasies that are only amplified by the distance and time that goes by.

    i understand that this lust is fleeting and i would never get into anything deeper than this. i would never ask or expect him to leave his wife. we arent even friends on Facebook and he recommended that we do not save each others phone numbers in our cellphones. i could care less.

  • At 4:08 am on August 9, 2012, Exaspirated Anonymous commented:

    hmmm.didn’t know i would be saying this but….sex with a married man had never been unthinkable to me before now. i’m a full blown adult, born again christian (or so i tot, spiritual and all…until i met him. we bonded very quickly and too intimately ignoring the warning signs. he is gentle, sensual and a perfect sweetness any girl will find in a man. I know it’s wron, he’s married…and i am tying the knots too my self in less than 6wks. what can i say, i got into this mess, will have to wriggle out scandal free.thou it’s difficult….

  • At 12:06 pm on August 17, 2012, Kate Cobie commented:

    This is quite sickening to read. Life is for living well what about that poor woman that has pledged her heart to this man who is fucking around with one of you. What if it was your dad that was having a bit on the side? How would you feel then? If you want a serious relationship with someone who is involved, surely you’d wait until they had divorced their spouse. What I am reading is pure selfishness and greed, of course the men aren’t in the right, but the callousness and ‘It doesn’t affect me so I’m going with the flow’ mentality is truly shocking. you wouldn’t be saying the same thing if the wife was your sister.

  • At 5:56 pm on August 19, 2012, speaking my mind. commented:

    So all you girls calling the women who are sleeping w/married men “whores, homewreckers, & sluts ” are annoying AF because first of all it takes TWO to fuck around. You can’t just throw all the blame on one person when both parties are equally at fault.
    That being said I’ve known this guy for about 5yrs. He is married & we hang out often. He is good company, great looking, & just so amazing to talk to. He is in the process of getting a divorce due to the fact that He is unhappy & doesn’t love her. He had gotten her pregnant when they were seniors in HS & so He wouldn’t be away from his baby He took her to the court & married her. No proposal no Nothing. I feel bad at times but I told him I don’t want anything to do w/him until the divorce is done because He had asked me to be his girlfriend. He said ok that’s fine & He understands Where I’m coming from. The same way you get your man is the same way you need to keep him. You can’t get married & stop being a wife or pleasing him the eat you did when you first met & just wanting wanting wanting from him. If you let your husband leave the house hungry or horny then your bringing it upon yourself. Whatever He isn’t getting at home He will get elsewhere. So all these btchs calling girls names for doing this & saying how “sickening” it is….please spare us the damn lectures. We are all adults, grown woman. Know the consequences. So if your gonna sit there & say how dirty a slut a girl is for sleeping w/a married man then don’t forget to call him a few names because more than likely He approached her & to the girl who said “say no & they’ll be a lot less divorces” BTCH PLEASE STFU….. there won’t be because if someone is unhappy they’re gonna wonder regardless. & you girls involved w/a married man don’t blame yourself because if He is going through a divorce or gonna get one soon it’s not your fault, your not the blame. You can’t help yourself if you lose feelings for someone. So people need to get over it. Yes it’s wrong & people will get hurt however, it’s happening all the day & this world is full of sin so YOU wake up & smell the damn coffee. Don’t worry about other women sleeping w/married men. Worry about keeping yours Happy & satisfied so He doesn’t go sleep w/these other women. Enough said.

  • At 6:18 pm on August 19, 2012, steph. commented:

    The mistress didn’t make vows to the wife, He did. The mistress doesn’t love the wife, He supposedly does so STOP BLAMING IT ALL ON THE WOMEN SLEEPING W/THE MARRIED MAN. In my opinion I think those single women are looking for love & want attention. When they are approached by a good looking guy showing them interest then they go for it even if He is married. He lies & says he’s unhappy & only w/her for the children but in reality he’s truly a scumbag.

  • At 12:25 pm on August 20, 2012, Been there!!!!! commented:

    To all you ladies on here, let a man who has screwed up give some advise.

    First of all, I love my wife with all my heart. She is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. Us men if you will are just like everyone else in the world, we have an itch that needs to be scratched. I have cheated on my wife but I will not leave her. All we want is some strange. If any of you think for a second that by us cheating that we will fall in love with our mistress and leave our wife, your sadley mistaken. The reason is, oir wives give us the compasion, security, love, and emotional feelings that most guys dont admit to. Our fling gives us that hot, juicey, toe curling sex that we fantasize about. We are giving in to our sexual instinct but our hearts and souls will always be with our wives. There exceptions to the rule but this is for the majority. If your tired or feel lime you want ojt then leave and make sure he knows. In the end, we will find someone else if we desire

  • At 7:47 am on August 22, 2012, Love Fairy commented:

    Hi All, I am so happy to have found this forum… and here is what I have to say on the matter:

    Life is complicates and connecting with another human being is the most complicated thing one can imagine, it seems so easy when you see a couple holding hands but the truth is .. it’s not as easy as it seems. My love life has been horrible, I am 21 years old I know what you will say - i am young… but no my first boyfriend came at a very difficult time in my life i was 16 he was twice my age, he lied about it after the second year of my relationship with him I found that there is another woman - me, he’s been dating a girl for 8 years and he’s been divorced with a child, anyway he was a bad man, i broke up with him eventually but by that time i was 19, then i fell in love with a guy who was 24 we were together for a short period of time but the distance was the problem he has some issues… after another eight months only recently I was with one guy at the age of 26 and it turned out that he is divorced too with two kids… we spent a night together he didnt call me for two weeks after that and now he is begging me to see him but i no longer want to have anything to do with him, during my school year my university teacher fell in love with me he is married with two kids but I said a huge NO and nothing happened for which I am very proud although i liked him….but two months back I fell in love with a married man who is at the age of 43… yes he is married with two kids… I don’t want to do anything with him because I can imagine what it would be like if i was the wife… We go out every week for a dinner and some drinks but this can’t go on like this… I am so in love now that I don’t know what to do… My love life is a total disaster… I still haven’t slept with a married man… but I feel like i will never meet anyone like him…
    That’s why I am saying we all have to get sane and leave those married men alone… it’s not fair on us… we deserve A FAIRYTALE not this … not the hiding not the lies not the cheating… we deserve to be loved… not used and hidden… A man should be proud to be with you and show you off to the world because this is how much he loves you… he shouldn’t be able to look away even for a minute and he should only be thinking about you, why? because you are the most amazing human being… I know it’s not easy and I know it’s complicated but it’s for the best they should know better - they shouldn’t have gotten married if they were to cheat … what kind of happiness is that in the first place, plus if he is unhappy at home why should you make him happy outside home - so that he could happily return home??? NO!!!!!!!!!!

  • At 8:19 pm on October 13, 2012, Similar Situation commented:

    we have been developing feeling for each other for almost a year. i haven’t slept with him yet. but we are planning to meet up at my place when his wife is out of town. i want to call the whole thing off, but at the same time i really really want him. i want to be selfish for once and just do something that will make me feel alive. i don’t plan on anyone to find out so, right now the problem that i am facing is whether or not i can pull myself out of the situation after the deed is done. this could be especially difficult, when we both confess that we love each other. he still cares for his wife, but is committed to stay married so that she can get her green card.

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    I haven’t slept with a married man. I did fool around once with a separated guy (they lived apart, both seeing others). I felt bad for that though and never did again.

    I did give a bj to a guy w/ gf once. And I was raped by a guy w/ gf and strung along once or twice til I found guts to say no. Finally, I fooled around once with a married FEMALE (lesbian experience).

    Several married and taken men came onto me but I turned them all down.

    When I moved from arizona to oregon 7 yrs ago, a catty neighbor dug for dirt on me. I blushed and she spread false rumors. Now hundreds of women in my community hate me and gossip about me and ostracize me. Oregon is very moral and asexual.

    this is what I think about this topic:
    #1 Biologically humans aren’t wired for monogamy.
    #2 Some women are more prone to temptation than others
    #3 Same with men for #2
    #4 ‘Forbidden’ sex feels better because of our ancient polygamic/animal natures
    #5 ‘Other women’ aren’t evil most of them. Same w/ married men who cheat.
    #6 Married women want their men to be faithful. They shame other women so that women will stop that behavior. If they could they’d kill all the ‘whores’ to maintain their spouse’s fidelity.
    #7 This makes a huge conflict between married woman and mistress.
    #8 This conflict will never be resolved unless legal action is taken, but that will never happen.
    #9 If you want your man to be faithful, move to Oregon. Everyone here is asexual and there’s 0 flirting, nearly 0 cheating. There are no attractive people. Everyone is the same. Men want to be faithful and are. Women too. All women police and HATE anyone who doesn’t have a perfect past, ensuring women are all 100% perfect.
    #10 Life is a conflict everywhere but Oregon.
    #11 I’m a very understanding, non-judgmental person. I’m very good but my past isn’t 100% perfect. But life is shit and people are assholes.

  • At 1:53 am on November 22, 2012, Juniper commented:

    p.s. when i fooled around w/ the separated guy, we didn’t have sex.

    More thoughts:
    #12 A lot of ‘other women’ get emotionally attached to their MM. This causes them pain becuz he usually just wants them ‘on the side.’
    #13 It’s usually best to not get involved w/ a MM. You should break it off to save more pain.
    #14 Personally I think it’s best to never get involved with one. But I am understanding so I see how and why it can happen. I’ve known married people who fall for other married people, cheat, then leave their partner for them. I know most women will automatically judge and hate that scenario. But I have no judgment for it. To me it’s part of life, part of the risk of love.
    #15 It would be nice if all women abstained from taken men. But I know it would not be nice for men. And men’s biology pushes/begs/reels in/etc. for that. Just like in the animal kingdom. Men who are bedding one woman (wife) have more powerful seduction/pheromones, just as the sexy male in animal kingdom does.
    #16 women, try to change. try to not give in to temptation. our society calls for fidelity. i won’t hate or judge you forever like so many do to me.
    #17 men i understand your biological need and i don’t judge or hate you. i know it must be hard for you.
    #18 perhaps more people should be in open relationships.
    #19 perhaps women and men should learn to resist temptation more.
    #20 perhaps people should quit judging others so they can pull out of self-destructive behavior cycles. I think that the judgers/haters perpetuate bad behavior instead of make it better! Especially how they paint you into a corner forever. Look what they did to me.
    Just some thoughts. Hope it helped someone…

  • At 1:59 am on November 22, 2012, Juniper commented:

    p.s. my minor booboos were 16 yrs ago when i was coming of age. i’ve always been faithful to my hubby of 11 years. i’m not bragging. i just feel compelled to say this after the enormous hate women constantly throw at me. Women are scary.

  • At 2:11 am on November 22, 2012, Juniper commented:

    a part of me looks at it like this:
    a lot of men need sex w/ multiple partners. so they do it discreetly. Women are naturally drawn to ‘men in the action’ so some get swept away. This is biology at work. Part of me doesn’t see any of this as bad, just as part of life.

    then another part of me is like this: our society has rules for marriage: be faithful. i want my hubby to be faithful as i am to him. which is why i don’t sleep w/ married people nor do i flirt, etc. live by the golden rule.

    sleeping w/ a mm sells yourself way short. you jip yourself, you’re the one who gets hurt. why hurt you? control your urges and save yourself for someone single. it’s what you’d want someone to do irt your man.

    We can overcome the natural man. maybe not perfectly our whole lives. but if we falter, get out of the bad situation and start new/fresh. Vow to be strong from then on. And be smart unlike me….don’t tell anyone of your past private skeletons. Even if they try to drag it out of you, don’t blush. don’t let them. But if they do, just drop it and ignore it. never explain to anyone or defend yourself.

    because women are vultures and evil and power hungry about this topic. They can get very scary and ganglike and threatening and forever unforgiving and destructive. Worst human behavior I’ve ever seen.

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