March 15, 2011
I was swept off my feet by a psycho who I ended up marrying….
I was in a relationship with the best guy in my life. He was supportive and really loved me. He bought a house for us to live in and was always thinking of me. When I had met him he was a player, very gorgeous and quite the ladies man. He matured and settled down with me. When I graduated from nursing school there were no jobs in Canada so he agreed to move to the USA with me and we rented out the house. While in the States I was swept off my feet stupidly by a psycho who I ended up marrying. He was abusive (not at first of course, it was a process). This awesome man had moved back to Canada but I begged him to come and get me which he did. I was so messed up I just left him again to go back to the abuser (I was trapped in the cycle of abuse). Now years later thankfully I am divorced and safe. My amazing guy has moved on happily and now has a baby with someone. I wake up every morning YEARS later with a sinking feeling in my stomach. I know I messed up……………..it hurts and I REGERT IT SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by: Michelle
At 5:08 pm on April 2, 2011, Anonymous commented:
i understand… but hindsight is 20/20… i was with a guy for 5 years that TRULY loved me… he was caring, sweet, compassionate… during the course of our 5 year relationship he NEVER said anything demeaning or disrespectful (until the very end when i became so rude and down right mean- it was like i would push him to see where his breaking point was- how much control i had). well, i chased me career and am currently in a relationship with a guy that doesn’t treat me 10% as well as my ex- fiance did…. my ex is now married. i guess we have to move on and hope karma will give us a second chance.
At 3:46 pm on June 10, 2011, dark angel commented:
“it was like i would push him to see where his breaking point was- how much control i had.” Sounds like me…. deep breath… here it goes, At about 17 I fell in love with someone I invisioned as amazing, I mean he had all the potential in the world and thru my eyes and young heart he was all I needed and wanted. I was with him faithfully for 2 years, we’ve been together for 5… In the begining of our relationship I was hooked I mean like he was meth or something I couldn’t get enough. In the begining, he being young he cheated countless times he would make comments in regards to my weight (im cubby not fat! like raven symone in her early thats so raven days…) etc. I had very low self esteem and I thought he was as good as it gets. I grew balls and broke up with him and dated this guy that he knew just to get back at him (never again) we touched kissed etc…. I mean he did his thing too I was hearing all kind of wild stories about him and having his myspace password and email password didn’t help much… Never the less we got back together he said I grew and I thought he grew and at the end of the day he was who I wanted to be with (self esteem)… Being with him I was hooked again every conversation I had I included him there wasn’t a time he hadn’t crossed my mind. Our friend died and around this time I found him flirting with other girls didn’t take heap to it and then I found out he was cheating again, we broke up and this time I thought it was for good shit so did he… I took intrest in a family friend who is 12 years older then me and we dated, having an older guy is mind blowing I expirence a lot of new things. The point of this shit is I’m playing the shit out of two men, they both think I’m loyal to them and they know about each other but they refer to one another as my ex… and to be frank I’m not moved by it they are both men and have equally fucked me over that doesn’t justify my fucked up moves and I know damn well I’m being stupid but I get a trill out of it… The only thing is I feel bad for my first love he was young and didn’t want to be in love and as we grew he grew to love and admire me as a woman, his family loves me he talks about having kids and a lifetime with me… I’m well roundly fucked up but hey this is what happens when a good girl goes bad… the dark sucks her in, damn I wanna be honest and have morals again…
At 10:40 pm on December 20, 2011, anonymous commented:
You will have to try and be brave and move on,you only have one life don’t waste any more of it regretting what you did when you lacked the insight and maturity to act any differently,you have a profession which can take you practically anywhere in the world,why not start afresh somewhere else?I too married a creep,was made very unhappy,I thought I loved him at the beginning but it was only enfatuation,I finally divorced him,and took myself to the other side of the world and never regretted it,don’t stay in that groove,time passes,we do not know long our life will last,you will not make the same mistakes again,give yourself a chance and stop punishing yourself.Take care Michelle.
At 2:13 pm on December 1, 2012, A poor excuse of a wife commented:
I have a story, one that I keep regret too and continue to add to it. I was with a boy (high school sweetheart) for five years. We both felt so strongly connected but then high school is over and we both experience different things and I decide to leave him. I end up pregnant out of spite by another man, and that relationship turns to shit so I end up leaving him. I end up with my high school sweet heart again but I realize that he is not ready to take on the role as a father, meanwhile this other man fits the role perfectly and wants to be involved in my life. I am now married to this other man and has become a great father to my son and his son I had with him. BUT!!!! then why???? Do I keep on involving my high school sweetheart in my life. To clarify, my high school sweetheart and I don’t see each other but rather speak on the phone for hours, it’s like a mental pleasure, we can talk about anything and always have something to say. I don’t want to say its not cheating because some people may see it as if it is and I agree. My husband has never given me any reason for me to think he is seeing other woman and I have always had complete trust in him. I have been with my husband for more than five years now and I do love him for his heart and attention he gives us but I don’t feel complete . My husband and I don’t really talk much about anything, we are not best friends yet in his mind, he thinks this is just a normal couples problem and maybe it is but I can’t help but feel differently. I have told him in many ways what I need and I do see him trying even though he’s found out about my high school sweetheart. I have felt bad about this whole situation and I have stopped things with my high school sweetheart many times before but I seem to always go back to it, hence the reason why I mentioned in the beginning that I keep on adding to my regret. Now that I want to stop things AGAIN with my high school sweetheart I fear that this time it would be too late. You can only hurt someone so much until they break and I’ve hurt my husband enough. You see, I can’t imagine my life without my husband and yet it is so hard to say that he is all I need. I don’t blame anyone for my doings but myself. My regret has gotten so bad that I can’t find a way out. I have even considered suicide just to relieve my shame but I know that, that won’t make anything better so I have decided to kick out all of the bones in my closet and maybe starting fresh will be the answer.