November 12, 2011
Am I someone who screams at deeply hurt children? Can I ever be forgiven?…
I regret saying extremely hurtful words to a girl who has already been rejected by her parents. She stole 450 and two cell phones, as well as many other things leading up to this. I, as a caretaker, said I hated her, she is a worthless piece of trash, and that I can see why her mother doesn’t want her anymore. I wanted to break her spirit because she still refuses to give up one of the phones and all of the money. We have been fighting for 3 days and she never gave up the things we know she has, so I wanted to express the hurt she has done to me by wounding her spirit, too. Now I feel like the worst person ever and wished I had been more gentle with her.
I am scared of the person that I apparently am--someone who screams at deeply hurt children. Can I ever be forgiven?
Submitted by: So Sorry
At 12:19 pm on November 12, 2011, Do over commented:
You were frustrated. You went too far. Have you asked her for forgiveness? Explained you were hurt, provoked, that harming people can lead to more harm, that it can be an endless reactive chain until someone stops it, doesn’t react, stands up?…. You got caught up, reacted too harshly. The original crime was wrong, is wrong, but as a teacher/adult you lost the chance to deliver that lesson effectively. Go back. Admit you were wrong to behave as you did, invite her to do the same, stop the escalation, stand up, and at least this time lead by example.
At 3:49 pm on November 12, 2011, Anonymous commented:
Maybe it’s worth you considering a different line of work? Getting out of the care-taking business? Maybe you’re burnt out, particularly on the tough cases? Sometimes we lose our way, aren’t doing what we’re meant to be doing and so act against our better judgment, our character.