January 7, 2012
I slept with my best friend and everything changed….
I regret the choices I’ve made regarding my friends. Six years ago I slept with my best friend at the time and everything changed, all we did was hurt each other saying things we both didn’t mean. It was both our first time and I honestly believed it ruined our friendship and has left a heavy burden on my heart even to this day. Making me attempt suicide many times and go through too much mental struggles and years of therapy. It broke my heart, soul and mind. It to this day has made me consider relationships physical and emotional. I know it feels petty and stupid but it makes me feel insecure and alone even when I’m not. I guess I don’t know how to deal with the situation and I know I’m lying to myself when I tell myself that I’m okay. I feel like a coward due to fact that I’m too afraid to open myself up to her. I’m terrified and I feel as if I’ll never love again….
Submitted by: Anonymous1991Aus
At 12:47 pm on January 8, 2012, Self-love commented:
You sound young and that’s a gift, no? Is there not yet time and hope to believe you’ll have another crack at love and sex, with someone else? Life is long, despite what people tell you. It’s an endurance race and so you must forgive yourself a lot. You can only stop so long to beat yourself up. There’s too much to do, too many possibilities, too many people out there, each one in some way singular (though, alas, not always a walk in the park, not always a good fit for your make-up or for his or hers; that’s why you have to keep seeking). You did nothing wrong, really, except take a risk, and that’s what you’re here to do. Try and fail and then try again.
At 7:07 pm on January 9, 2012, anonymous commented:
You are in a lot of pain,and that pain has lasted a very long time,affecting your life in a very negative way,you need help to start seeing things in perspective,and to overcome your burden of guilt,I don’t know if you have already seen a counsellor,but I guess you have not, because you are still paralysed by regrets,you and your friend were very young at the time you had sex,this does happen between friends,because friends can also be attracted physically to one another and very often things work out,sadly it did not in your case,but you are not to blame neither is your friend,this state of affair cannot go on like this for you,you have a life to live,we have many love in one life and all different as we mature,stop beating on yourself and give yourself a chance by seeking help so you can find yourself again and reclaim your life.Life is “trial and errors”,this is how we grow even as we go through ordeals.Don’t let that experience ruin the rest of your life,and I will say it,yes,life passes and you deserve better.Take care.
At 7:50 pm on January 10, 2012, anonymous commented:
if you have gone through years of therapy and still agonise about what happened between you and your friend,and it seems a fair while ago,it appears that you do not want to let go,you will not reclaim your life if you persist with this,it seems you wish you could go back and change things, not say the things you said and done the things you did but all this is in restrospect,no matter how you hang on,you cannot go back,you can change things in the future thought by forming a loving relationship with someone and have a life with them,you can change things but in the future if you give yourself a chance,when you were young you did not have the insight you have now or the knowledge,you did not so much make “mistakes” as have learning experiences all of us have if we recognize them,things did not work out with your friend,you said some very hurtful things to each other,you cannot allow this life incident to paralyse you emotionally to the extent that you shut the door to life and continue agonizing about it,it was a learning curve and we all need them to grow,the best compensation for any losses and mistakes made is a life well lived.You have a choice,please choose life.take care.