iRegret.net

OK this is my 1st but i have to tell someone. I am a married 27 year old paramedic with 1 year boy. My husband and I get along but we never see each other and I know he never cheats. I have gained a lot of weight after having my baby so my self esteem is low. Well a guy at work started hitting on me. He got fired from his last job for sexual comments but i like him. We ended up kissing and then later messing around but never having full sex. The part that make this even worst is he is Amish and married so i know nothing will come of it. But if we get caught his wife will forgive him and I will lose everything but i have a hard time saying no, he has this way with me.

Submitted by: medic

So I was involved with a married man for 6 months. At the time he was separated. He then went back to his wife. This relationship was more of a swingers type style for us. But we did sleep together a few times. And he went from talking to me everyday to just stopping all together. We were just friends. I know what we did was wrong, I just don’t get why the friendship ended, because he wanted to be friends. We clicked so well. And now I am the one that was burned badly. Does he feel anything?

Submitted by: Confused

I regret the choices I’ve made regarding my friends. Six years ago I slept with my best friend at the time and everything changed, all we did was hurt each other saying things we both didn’t mean. It was both our first time and I honestly believed it ruined our friendship and has left a heavy burden on my heart even to this day. Making me attempt suicide many times and go through too much mental struggles and years of therapy. It broke my heart, soul and mind. It to this day has made me consider relationships physical and emotional. I know it feels petty and stupid but it makes me feel insecure and alone even when I’m not. I guess I don’t know how to deal with the situation and I know I’m lying to myself when I tell myself that I’m okay. I feel like a coward due to fact that I’m too afraid to open myself up to her. I’m terrified and I feel as if I’ll never love again….

Submitted by: Anonymous1991Aus

I lost my job. It had been a long time since I enjoyed it. My boss, who hired me, was let go a few years ago, and a buffoon replaced him. It’s tough working for someone for whom you have little respect, who doesn’t know what he’s about, who can’t recall conversations or commitments made, but it’s tougher yet (and harder to digest) when the buffoon is the one who lets you go after nearly seven years. We all know at least in theory that life is not a meritocracy, but to experience first-hand that it doesn’t much matter how good your work is and that your fate is subject to the whims of a belly-button-gazing, spiritually stunted moron is pretty startling stuff. How many times do we have to lose our innocence?

Submitted by: Still Naive

I regret not telling the girl of my dreams that I loved her. She was the most amazing person: clever, funny, and different than most people. I regret not speaking up, not going for it. I am sorry for myself and apologize to the past me. I regret a lot.

Submitted by: Miscellaneous

I regret never caring about anything. Not caring is like a drug, it is so addictive…..when you don’t care you can do anything, say anything, get anything…….but the one thing you can’t do if you don’t care is feel.  Up until a year ago, when my father died, I hadn’t felt anything in so long I have almost forgotten what it is like. I have alienated my friends and family, and even when I am in the company of others, I am alone. One of the reasons I stopped caring, so long ago, was that it hurt so much to care. I was sexually abused by a family member when I was seven. I was so filled with self hate and disgust, and anger, at my very existence, that I wanted to kill myself at that young age. The only way to escape this torment was to stop caring about anything, and that’s what I did.  Two decades later, I sit alone in my multi million dollar condo, watching the snow fall, typing this. With my money and career success, many would envy my life but, for me, it has been an empty, lonely, meaningless hell. I have pushed everyone away who has approached me, because I could not believe that anyone would be stupid enough to actually care about me. I have hated everyone for the love they have in their lives and, at the same time, despised the concept of love itself. I am both a bitter old man in a young mans body, and a scared angry, wounded child in an adults body.  I guess my dads death shook something loose because I feel things now, but mostly only anger, regret, and sadness, both at what I have missed in my life, and what I will most likely miss in the future. There are times when I draw the logical conclusion that I should kill myself, and I frankly can’t think of a reason not to anymore, and in some ways I am right back where I started at 7 years old.  I am drinking alot and feel incoherent most of the time, which is better than consciousness. It hurts so much to care, but it hurts even more not to.

Submitted by: Tom

I regret having a freak out yesterday and basically breaking up with the love of my life via email. What is wrong with me??? Only an asshole and a monster would do something that tacky and I know it! I regret it and wish I could hit delete…I hurt the love of my life and now he will probably never want anything to do with me ever again. We emailed a couple times last night and I did write back telling him I was sorry and instead of freaking out I should have worked it out with him in person and that I didnt want to lose him…but its probably too late…how would I feel if someone did that to me, it is low and shitty and I am so ashamed of myself.

Submitted by: stupid girl

I regret all the family who have chosen to be absent my whole life, I’ll never understand that. I regret feeling like my dad leaving when I was young was somehow my fault, I regret wishing he would come back so I could know him and I regret when he came back into our lives some 15 years later, because it became painfully obvious things were better without him around. I regret the abandonment issues and feelings of disappointment I gained as a result. I regret that my Mom has been through so much. I regret the deep, dark depression I have at times that I just wish would go away. I regret when I don’t believe in myself and when I seem to be afraid of success because I think it will leave like people do. As a result, I regret not going to university, where I knew that I could be and do anything. I regret that my mom gave up all of my siblings for adoption. I regret when I’ve felt that I needed to hurt myself to feel better, and I even more regret following through with it. I regret having OCD and how it makes me feel productive and anxious all at once. I regret when I say “sorry” in a situation I know damn well wasn’t my fault so it will be over. I regret all the years I spent being self-destructive, my time could’ve been spent doing much better things. I regret all the times I gave in to my husband’s demands for sex when I didn’t want to at the time but didn’t want to ruin the night with a fight. I regret wasting so much time and money being high. I regret having to pretend like nothings wrong so often, so much pretending. When my husband has thrown things at me and been verbally abusive and manipulative, I regret being married and the fact that I didn’t leave years sooner. I regret pushing all of this deep down inside, and more….

Submission: Me

I regret nothing. Every mistake that I have made is a part of me that painfully reminds me how shitty I am. Even the smallest one.

Submitted by: Anonymous

I lied about my whole life to some friends years ago, I told them I had a horrible childhood…that I had been severely abused in every way, that my father was actually my step father (because my “father” went to prison for abusing me) and that I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. I lost all my friends apart from one who still thinks all this is true. It still tears me up inside because I have actually had the best childhood and I really do have the best parents in the world. I just want to turn back time and never have lied. It has ruined my mental health.

Submitted by: Jennifer

I am scared of the person that I apparently am--someone who screams at deeply hurt children. Can I ever be forgiven?

Submitted by: So Sorry

I regret that our marriage has come to this, that you cannot talk to me, that you avoid me, leave the room when I enter. I regret not finding a way to reach you — I tried words, I tried love, I tried anger but you are silent. I regret that I am trapped. I regret that I am even here but I can’t leave my children. I regret wishing I could become fatally ill so I could leave this world with dignity and release myself from this loveless life of boredom and sadness.

Submitted by: Jane

I’ve been sleeping with a married man for a little over six months now. It’s been killing me inside. But I woke up this morning and realized it’s been a long time since I’ve felt for someone as I do for him. I’ve tried to tell myself I don’t love him, that I couldn’t love someone who was married. But I’m lying to myself. I do love him and would do anything for him. He doesn’t have any children which I feel would really steer me away… He’s just in a loveless marriage away from his friends and family. He is just like me in a man form. He have so much fun when we are together. He told me he looked into divorce the other day… I know I definitely don’t need to be getting my hopes up but I am miserable without him. I’ve been miserable for so long and have finally found someone to makes me feel alive again. I believe that everything happens for a reason. If we are meant to be apart then we will be. But as they say you can’t help who you love. Love knows no boundaries. In my eyes he is perfect for me.

Submitted by: Jaimie

i regret being nice to you when you were going through really hard times, because i didn’t know you were going to rape me a few months later.

Submitted by: corey

I regret leading our marriage to your affair. I gave up and you found comfort in her. And you can’t forgive yourself. I regret that my very existence reminds you that you cheated. That you were “that guy.”

Submitted by: chris

i regret letting you touch me. i wasn’t ready but i did it, thinking you’d be happy.

i regret giving in and apologising, later realising that i did nothing wrong. You’re angry because i refused phone sex with you, and i said sorry and wanted to make it up to you. i regret being so stupid. i regret letting you emotionally blackmail me, threatening to cheat if i didn’t please you that way.

i regret being confused about how i’m feeling. but i know that even if you leave, i might just be better off.

Submitted by: teen girl

I regret, being so self-conscious, so insecure and so scared. I regret being rude and cold to those around me so as to protect my self. I regret those missed opportunities due to my shyness and embarrassment of that first move. I regret being so young naive and hopeful. I regret living with more what ifs then never again. I regret my stupid and reckless mistakes. I regret most of all being so self absorbed and regretting what I do regret.

Submitted by: a

I regret making the first cut.

Submitted by: Signe

I regret that I am sleeping with a married man.

I am a complete hypocrite. I kicked out my own husband of ten years, just three months ago. For cheating.

Then a month later, I bumped into an old friend in the supermarket. This is a guy I’ve known since I was a child, and we always liked each other, but never got it together. I always bump into him in the supermarket, as I am a manager there, and we always say hello, and we are also friends on Facebook. After this particular time, I received an inbox message from him, and we got chatting. By the end of the evening, we had swapped numbers, and have spoken every day since. It’s been 7 weeks.

We’ve been out together, and I have slept with him. He doesn’t wear his wedding ring, and has even met my mother when he came to pick me up to take me to work one morning, whilst his wife was at work, and had a coffee with us before we set off. He has told me he has fallen in love with me, and has admitted he is deliberately not sleeping with his wife in the hope she will end it with him because he cannot. He feels tied to her and the marriage. They have only been married for two years, and her family gave them thousands towards their dream wedding.

There have been numerous occasions when I have said I need to walk away from the situation, but then he will send me messages telling me he loves me and can’t be without me, and that he doesn’t want me to turn my back on him.

People at work have noticed him and asked who he is, as he will come and see me at work, and will hug me on the shop floor, and he says he doesn’t care who sees. He posts links to songs on Facebook, and often comments on my posts. People at work have asked who he is, as body language gives a lot away. I told one of my staff he is a friend who is married, and she said it doesn’t look like he will be for much longer with the way he looks at me.

He is currently on holiday with his wife, and has sent me numerous texts every day, telling me how much he loves me and how much he is missing me, and has said he will be straight in to see me at work as soon as he gets back from his holiday.

All my friends who I have confided in have said the same thing, he may be saying he can’t leave his wife, but his actions are saying otherwise. They don’t seem to think it will be long before their relationship is over.

I know I am a terrible person, and I hate what I am doing, yet I can’t imagine my life without him anymore. It isn’t just about sex. We have only slept together twice, yet we’ve seen each other roughly 2-3 times a week before he went on holiday.

I know I should walk away, but every time I try, I backtrack.

Submitted by: A Terrible Woman

i regret the lies i have told and how i have let people walk all over me. Each individual person is beautiful and we make mistakes, just like every other human being. 

i regret not being myself and i ask for the strength to find people who love and want me please god

Submitted by: Claire

I regret ever meeting my ex. He manipulated me, he lied to me, he called me horrible names, he tore down my self esteem, he made me think every thing was my fault, he made up stories so that I’d feel bad for him, he threatened me when I tried to escape, he blamed me for his mistakes. When I tried to move on, he made even more mistakes and tried to make me feel bad for them, and tried to manipulate me out of my moving on. He blamed me for his stupid decisions. I even got yelled at for liking a celebrity! He was all too possessive and mean and put me though hell every single day of my life. I so deeply regret not ignoring his threats of suicide and leaving his ass around month 5.

Submitted by: Sailor

I regret caring what others thought of me. I regret not standing up for myself. I regret I went to see my friend that day and met you on the way. Honestly I just wish I was supersmart and could see through people’s lies. I regret being so naive and gullible. I regret thinking people were as honest as me. I regret answering your call. I regret deciding to come hang out. I don’t regret telling you no even though you decided to take it from me anyways. I regret I didn’t tell anyone until it had festered into a sickness inside of me. I regret every second that I wasted thinking it was somehow my fault.

Submitted by: Anonymous

I regret having an argument with my boyfriend the night before he killed himself. I regret the things I said. I regret that I was in a bad head space when we met. Life could have been so different. In our short time together, it became intense so quickly. His smile could light up a room. His kindness had no limits. The sincerity he extended to everyone was like no one else I have met. He was an amazing man. The world lost a good one when he died. I will miss him every day.

Submitted by: Belinda

I regret being shy.

Submitted by: No one